Brass In Pocket (vs Johnny Cannon)
Sept 29, 2016 13:32:02 GMT -5
Post by Noelle Smith on Sept 29, 2016 13:32:02 GMT -5
[Online Blog: Noelleicious.com]
Have Faith
Hello FGA Fans
We move forward. I can’t deny the facts, I came up short in that five-way fray. It’s disappointing, because I wanted it bad. There’s no hiding that, I wouldn’t dare try. I wanted that chance to face Fujiko Mine again, to show her and everyone else how I’ve grown. From there, if I managed to defeat her one more time? I fully meant to follow through with what I’d said to Izzy Anders. Because if I could take that title from Fujiko, making a bit of the past repeat itself, I was… no, I am, hungry as well to see if Izzy can do the same to me - or if this time I’ve grown enough to turnabout. And Izzy if you’re reading this, when I make it happen, when I get the Pride title no matter who holds it I will give you the match you want, no matter how hard the trip is to get me there.
Right now, Molly Reid gets to go and give her best shot to Fujiko. All of us that were in that match trying for the shot she won, fair and square, I think will be watching. I know I will.
I’m not going to stop. I’m going to keep pushing, I’m going to keep growing. There’s no other choice.
#MuchLove
Noelle
=[off cam]=
September 26 2016
Noe told him after, to his face how thankful she was that he took the time out to help her. She could feel her lower lip tremble a little because she really meant it, a man like him had so much on his plate, and yet he found the time to come and help her. She hugged him because they were both sweaty and it didn’t matter so much, before they went on their separate ways to get cleaned up. The hot water and luxurious scented soap made her feel nearly human, cheered her up enough that she’d even let a small giggle slip past her lips when her shower flip-flops squeaked on the tiles. She took a pick out of her bag and worked it through her hair before she brushed it, then a dab of rose-scented leave in conditioner. Being around Kamijo had made her really start appreciating the little touches like that, the little luxuries that added up and she knew she felt better.
Every day was a little better, and a lot of that could be laid at his feet. Summerlyn Shae had asked her about him, she was polite about it - for her,that is. It appeared she was truly trying to make something of herself besides “Ruby’s Shadow” and she certainly couldn’t fault her for that. Noelle didn’t know if she’d forgiven her for her part of what had happened to her, but she could give credit where credit was due. Noelle had told her that it was none of her business, and if she pushed it would be very easy to go back to not talking to her again. A half smile came and went on her lips but that was more of her whimsy maybe than anything else. There wasn’t a definition for Kamijo, not a real one, because everyone only saw what he wanted them to see of him. Noelle counted herself extremely lucky in many ways with what he chose to show her, that he’d let her in, even just a little.
She sighed, because despite the proper padding and equipment she still felt every blow from that sparring session keenly now that the adrenaline and her desire to show him she was serious had calmed out of her bloodstream. Noelle closed her eyes, running a playback as it were, and she vividly recalled a few moments where she’d just felt entirely overwhelmed. He’d hit her with combinations, things she hadn’t anticipated, and at one point rocked her head back so hard after clipping her jaw her teeth had felt rattled despite the mouthguard she had in. Anyone that thought Sean Sands couldn’t hit had obviously never been hit by him, that was for sure.
Step, step, swing, dodge. It was almost like dancing, with pauses for impacts. Pure physical motion, where despite her desire to control, to think things through, to plan, she had to let it all go and just act on muscle memory and instinct. It was exhausting but in a very good way, and she couldn’t really imagine a better way to prepare for a match with a man like Johnny Cannon than this. Sweat had spattered the mat they worked on, enough that they’d had to pause to wipe it down before continuing or they could have ended up with a slip and fall which might have been amusing to watch but not so good for the pair of them.
But the purity of the sparring, she couldn’t deny that it had helped her mindset immensely. Noelle knew about Johnny’s attitude not just toward matches, but other wrestlers in general. It wouldn’t matter one bit to him that she’d been respectful towards him in the past, when he’d first joined FGA. His stated purpose in the world was to win with as much pain for the person that dared face him as he could muster. That sort of thing should scare the hell out of Noelle, she knew that. She’d dealt with time off from a knee issue, a shoulder injury, and that latest concussion issue… some day, Sara Cochran, one day, revenge! and she’d worked so damn hard to get back, to show she could come back and not only match what she’d done, but do better than before. It could all get ripped away in one fell swoop by Johnny, he surely wouldn’t hesitate to hurt her if he could even if he didn’t have to.
She shouldn’t be just scared of that, she should be downright terrified. Except… she just wasn’t. She knew if she allowed herself to be scared just because Johnny Cannon might try his best to hurt her, or ruin her, or end her career that she’d never have the guts to get in that ring and face anyone ever again. Her career would be well and truly over, and she couldn’t blame anyone else. Like Katt Williams said, ‘It’s SELF esteem, bitch!’ and that was pretty much true of a lot of things. She was the one that should dictate how she felt about what happened to her, and how she reacted to it, not someone else that didn’t have to live with the decisions.
Standing up she went to her tiptoes and stretched, working the kinks out of her back and her brain supplied her with the knowledge she’d have a few bruises tomorrow, but she was oddly fine with that. After she got dressed and headed out, she’d almost hoped to catch Sean, talk with him over coffee or something but he’d obviously had to leave before she was done. That was a shame, she didn’t get to see him nearly enough and she’d wanted to tell him again how much she appreciated his time and effort. She got her phone out then, and sent up a little Tweet.
You haven’t lost a step @theseansands
It was definitely true.
=[on cam]=
It wasn’t freezing per se in Michigan, but it was definitely below sixty and the sky above was darker than the time of day dictated, a scud of clouds giving it a silvery grey cast and the feel of the air on her skin spoke of rain. She had a thin zip-up hoodie on, open over her lavendar BRUTALapparel t-shirt and denim jeans, her hands currently jammed deep in the pockets as she paced in front of a nondescript brick wall. The reddish color of the bricks though, put her into a sharp contrast with her surroundings, like a bright plumaged bird. She finally paused, facing the camera with her head down as she started to speak, her voice firm despite the shiver that went over her body from the breeze passing through.
“Johnny Cannon has already dismissed me. He didn’t even bother to mock me on Twitter when the match was made. I’m not so egotistical to think that maybe Tony told him not to, though I’m completely sure that if Tony had, Cannon would have stepped where he was directed because that’s what Johnny Cannon does best. You’re New Kings, but honey the truth is you will never be the King. Doesn’t matter that you were the man that held the belt that Zero McHannon is getting his fingerprints all over daily, nightly, and ever so rightly either. You had it, he has it, and Sunshine Scandalous Tony Carmine will have it. You can like it or hate it, it doesn’t really matter because it’s… well that weird taste you’ve got in your mouth right about now? That’s inevitability, and I’d lay money on it happening. If Tony wants it bad enough, it’s going to happen.” A decisive nod, before Noelle looked up at the camera, her large eyes focused intently.
“I know you’re smarter than you’re given credit for. I also know that you are a better wrestler than you’re given credit for. Strip away the smart remarks, the puff piece fluffing of your current mouthpiece, Quinn Goodrich. He’s responsible for so much of what makes you - you, really right now that I hope you’re paying him what he’s worth...but strip that away, take off the illusion of a gentleman? There’s a hard, mean man who knows right from wrong but doesn’t give a shit, who calculates what he can play off whom, yet somehow? You don’t even see how you’re getting played.” Noelle lightly shook her head. “Johnny, I know too that you’re going to step into the ring with the full intention of hurting me in all the worst ways you can. You know like everyone else that I’ve just come back off of injured reserved. That I had to work hard to get cleared, that I got really lucky that what happened to me wasn’t worse. You, I’m sure of it, want to put me right back on the shelf. You want to shred apart any hope that I have, to continue to do what I love. You want to look down at me on the mat in a bloody and broken heap, and know you were the one that stopped my rise. You couldn’t possibly care less about me as a wrestler, heck if we’re honest you don’t care about me as a person, how I think and feel. You might be marginally aware that Tony does, but that won’t stop you, it won’t make you hesitate for an instant, right?
Noelle, she’s too goody goody to do anything about it. Noelle, she wouldn’t, couldn’t be mean enough to do anything about it. Noelle isn’t brutal enough,” a hint of irony in her tone as she smooths her hands down her sides, highlighting her BRUTALapparel lavender custom shirt. “Johnny, I’m so sure of you right now. You’ll tip your head back and look down your patrician nose at me, and tell me no one in this business hits harder than you, not anyone, no matter what the pundits and taglines might say otherwise. Who cares if there’s ten other guys out there just like you who pride themselves on knocking people out? Right? Because none of them are Johnny Cannon!”
Noelle sharply clapped her hands, then drew them out to rest at her sides again. “Johnny Cannon, you’re not as special as you think you are. Though boy to be honest nobody is as special as you think you are. You cast a long shadow, sure, but you somehow forgot the only way there’s shadow is if something is basking in the Sunshine.”
She snickered softly, looking down at her feet in her expensive leather boots. “Stop it Noelle! Stop it you vapid groupie sloot! Stop talking up Tony! You’re supposed to be talking about ME!” She looked up from under her lashes, gazing hard at the camera. “Am I close? Does it even matter? You’re not Tony, and I’m not a vapid groupie sloot, but perception is everything right? It’s the key in the lock, to open that door to victory, right?
I’m not so sure I buy that, JC. I think that you and people like you? Are selling a bill of goods, everything looks great on paper but you run that through the wash a few times and the ink fades and the shiny comes right off.
You want everyone to think this match between me and you was already in your pocket before either of us even opened our mouths. If I were someone else? I’d say that was nothing but your ego talking, whispering sweet nothings in your ear because my God do you have an ego. I would say that, but honestly? I get the feeling deep down that no one else believes I can beat you either.”
Noelle took a deep breath, squaring her shoulders and shifting her feet before she spoke. “I wish I had a fraction of your ego, simply because of the boost of confidence that comes with something like that, well… on the one hand I do. On the other? I’d rather not drink the poison that comes with it, if it’s all the same to you. I have let go a lot of conceits I had about myself and what I can do. With what I’ve gone through? I had no choice but to do it.
The thing is, even when people out there don’t believe I can beat you? I’m not letting that stop me, Johnny. I’m not going to stay hidden in the back, or at the hotel. I’m going to lace up my boots like always, and I’m going to look myself in the eye in the mirror before I head out for our match because I’ve fought hard to get here, Johnny. I’ve fought hard to change who and what I am, but I know no amount of words are going to prove it. I can only prove it through my actions, and be what I know I am now. It’s that simple, and that hard all at the same time.
But I’m going to do it, because I did work hard to get here and I keep working hard. It’s not a want, and it’s more than a need, more than just a desire to prove something or be the best.”
Noelle paused then paced slightly back and forth. “I can’t remain where I am, Johnny. I have to rise. I have to move forward, improve, evolve. I will not be stagnant, I will not slide down into a garbage bin like you’d want me to, I won’t regress. I refuse to. I’ll take what I learn from my losses and I’ll apply it until I win again - and make no mistake Johnny, I’m going to win again.
Not because I believe I’m better than you, or that I can’t lose, or any number of excuses people want to hide behind. Not me. I own my flaws, I own my past, like it or not it’s what got me here today, standing up in front of this camera, and talking to you like you’ll hear or understand a word I have to say.” A very European shrug, her hands up to gesture as she spoke again.
“Muhammed Ali once said - I don't have to be what you want me to be. Somewhere in my life I forgot that, Johnny. It’s not your fault or anyone else’s fault I did. But what’s your problem, is that I remembered that. So I’m not going to be what you expect when we meet in that ring. I’m not going to be that girl who smiles at people all the time because she’s just happy to be alive and doing what she loves, or who is nice to people because she wants to be, or who sends up cute puppy pictures or gifs of herself dancing on Twitter to cheer up people she likes and respects. That girl will be sitting in the back, waiting for me in the locker when I’m done with this match against you, Johnny.
Safe and sound, safe as houses.
The girl you meet in the ring is going to be the one that has a fire lit under her, in her. I won’t be stopped, I won’t stop, I won’t be denied. I’m hungry, and you’re the one that’s going to try and stand in my way. You can think this match means nothing. That it’s beneath you, that you can already count on that win, that you gain nothing from beating me. That’s fine. It’s just more fuel for me and I’m going to take all I can get.
Everyone thinks I can’t beat you, Johnny Cannon.”
She turns to walk away and pauses, looking back over her shoulder. “Everyone, except me.”
=[off cam]=
September 27 2016
She spent more time in Detroit than one would imagine, really. Sometimes it was a stop for her on the way to somewhere else. An appearance for charity. A meet and greet with fans for FGA. Public appearances to support when the company was touring, getting interest generated for shows, anything to get those tickets out the door. Her smile made her a popular choice for that sort of thing, and she usually didn’t mind doing it one bit. But she wasn’t in Detroit for any of those reasons, even though with minimal effort she could certainly arrange an interview with a locally founded wrestling blog, or get a freelance newspaper writer to talk to her on the phone for an Op-Ed piece about wrestling and what she thought about it, that would get tagged in with a stock photo she’d never remember sitting for.
Today though, she hoped her luck would hold out because she was bringing a present for someone that meant something to her, though she’d never actually sat down and thought about what or how much. He just simply was. The long box sat next to her in the backseat of the Yellow Cab, a bit longer and deeper than the average box for something like this, but one couldn’t just cram custom made spangle covered leather platform boots into just any old box. Her fingers toyed with the ribbons the box was decorated with, idly back and forth as she imagined the look on his face when he saw them, followed by a bite of her lip because she hadn’t phoned or texted first to see if he was even there today. That was the problem with surprises, so easy to want to do them, so easy for outside issues to mess them up.
She let her lip go and sank back into the seat with a sigh. Even if he wasn’t there she was sure someone would let her leave them in his office, and it wasn’t like he was shy, he’d definitely send her a snap of him wearing them. A sharp giggle came then as she thought about the high likelihood that he would send her a picture of him wearing the boots and nothing else, a faint hint of pink on her cheeks as she felt a bit of a blush coming up on her cheekbones. She saw the driver glance at her in the rearview mirror but she looked down fast, pretending to check her phone so he wouldn’t ask her questions. Usually she didn’t mind being sociable, even to a stranger like the cab driver, but right now inhabiting her thoughts until she could talk to someone that understood her felt like the smart thing to do.
His voice brought her out of that reverie though, letting her know that they’d arrived at the RISE gym, and she fished out cash to pay for the ride and a tip. She asked if he’d wait about ten minutes before leaving - if he was there, she’d stay if not she’d need a ride to the hotel. The cabbie shrugged and told her if she wanted to pay him for his time he’d do it, and she barely managed to keep from rolling her eyes as she handed him another twenty. Either way, it’d be worth it.
=[tbc]=
Word Count: 3428
Have Faith
Hello FGA Fans
We move forward. I can’t deny the facts, I came up short in that five-way fray. It’s disappointing, because I wanted it bad. There’s no hiding that, I wouldn’t dare try. I wanted that chance to face Fujiko Mine again, to show her and everyone else how I’ve grown. From there, if I managed to defeat her one more time? I fully meant to follow through with what I’d said to Izzy Anders. Because if I could take that title from Fujiko, making a bit of the past repeat itself, I was… no, I am, hungry as well to see if Izzy can do the same to me - or if this time I’ve grown enough to turnabout. And Izzy if you’re reading this, when I make it happen, when I get the Pride title no matter who holds it I will give you the match you want, no matter how hard the trip is to get me there.
Right now, Molly Reid gets to go and give her best shot to Fujiko. All of us that were in that match trying for the shot she won, fair and square, I think will be watching. I know I will.
I’m not going to stop. I’m going to keep pushing, I’m going to keep growing. There’s no other choice.
#MuchLove
Noelle
=[off cam]=
September 26 2016
Noe told him after, to his face how thankful she was that he took the time out to help her. She could feel her lower lip tremble a little because she really meant it, a man like him had so much on his plate, and yet he found the time to come and help her. She hugged him because they were both sweaty and it didn’t matter so much, before they went on their separate ways to get cleaned up. The hot water and luxurious scented soap made her feel nearly human, cheered her up enough that she’d even let a small giggle slip past her lips when her shower flip-flops squeaked on the tiles. She took a pick out of her bag and worked it through her hair before she brushed it, then a dab of rose-scented leave in conditioner. Being around Kamijo had made her really start appreciating the little touches like that, the little luxuries that added up and she knew she felt better.
Every day was a little better, and a lot of that could be laid at his feet. Summerlyn Shae had asked her about him, she was polite about it - for her,that is. It appeared she was truly trying to make something of herself besides “Ruby’s Shadow” and she certainly couldn’t fault her for that. Noelle didn’t know if she’d forgiven her for her part of what had happened to her, but she could give credit where credit was due. Noelle had told her that it was none of her business, and if she pushed it would be very easy to go back to not talking to her again. A half smile came and went on her lips but that was more of her whimsy maybe than anything else. There wasn’t a definition for Kamijo, not a real one, because everyone only saw what he wanted them to see of him. Noelle counted herself extremely lucky in many ways with what he chose to show her, that he’d let her in, even just a little.
She sighed, because despite the proper padding and equipment she still felt every blow from that sparring session keenly now that the adrenaline and her desire to show him she was serious had calmed out of her bloodstream. Noelle closed her eyes, running a playback as it were, and she vividly recalled a few moments where she’d just felt entirely overwhelmed. He’d hit her with combinations, things she hadn’t anticipated, and at one point rocked her head back so hard after clipping her jaw her teeth had felt rattled despite the mouthguard she had in. Anyone that thought Sean Sands couldn’t hit had obviously never been hit by him, that was for sure.
Step, step, swing, dodge. It was almost like dancing, with pauses for impacts. Pure physical motion, where despite her desire to control, to think things through, to plan, she had to let it all go and just act on muscle memory and instinct. It was exhausting but in a very good way, and she couldn’t really imagine a better way to prepare for a match with a man like Johnny Cannon than this. Sweat had spattered the mat they worked on, enough that they’d had to pause to wipe it down before continuing or they could have ended up with a slip and fall which might have been amusing to watch but not so good for the pair of them.
But the purity of the sparring, she couldn’t deny that it had helped her mindset immensely. Noelle knew about Johnny’s attitude not just toward matches, but other wrestlers in general. It wouldn’t matter one bit to him that she’d been respectful towards him in the past, when he’d first joined FGA. His stated purpose in the world was to win with as much pain for the person that dared face him as he could muster. That sort of thing should scare the hell out of Noelle, she knew that. She’d dealt with time off from a knee issue, a shoulder injury, and that latest concussion issue… some day, Sara Cochran, one day, revenge! and she’d worked so damn hard to get back, to show she could come back and not only match what she’d done, but do better than before. It could all get ripped away in one fell swoop by Johnny, he surely wouldn’t hesitate to hurt her if he could even if he didn’t have to.
She shouldn’t be just scared of that, she should be downright terrified. Except… she just wasn’t. She knew if she allowed herself to be scared just because Johnny Cannon might try his best to hurt her, or ruin her, or end her career that she’d never have the guts to get in that ring and face anyone ever again. Her career would be well and truly over, and she couldn’t blame anyone else. Like Katt Williams said, ‘It’s SELF esteem, bitch!’ and that was pretty much true of a lot of things. She was the one that should dictate how she felt about what happened to her, and how she reacted to it, not someone else that didn’t have to live with the decisions.
Standing up she went to her tiptoes and stretched, working the kinks out of her back and her brain supplied her with the knowledge she’d have a few bruises tomorrow, but she was oddly fine with that. After she got dressed and headed out, she’d almost hoped to catch Sean, talk with him over coffee or something but he’d obviously had to leave before she was done. That was a shame, she didn’t get to see him nearly enough and she’d wanted to tell him again how much she appreciated his time and effort. She got her phone out then, and sent up a little Tweet.
You haven’t lost a step @theseansands
It was definitely true.
=[on cam]=
It wasn’t freezing per se in Michigan, but it was definitely below sixty and the sky above was darker than the time of day dictated, a scud of clouds giving it a silvery grey cast and the feel of the air on her skin spoke of rain. She had a thin zip-up hoodie on, open over her lavendar BRUTALapparel t-shirt and denim jeans, her hands currently jammed deep in the pockets as she paced in front of a nondescript brick wall. The reddish color of the bricks though, put her into a sharp contrast with her surroundings, like a bright plumaged bird. She finally paused, facing the camera with her head down as she started to speak, her voice firm despite the shiver that went over her body from the breeze passing through.
“Johnny Cannon has already dismissed me. He didn’t even bother to mock me on Twitter when the match was made. I’m not so egotistical to think that maybe Tony told him not to, though I’m completely sure that if Tony had, Cannon would have stepped where he was directed because that’s what Johnny Cannon does best. You’re New Kings, but honey the truth is you will never be the King. Doesn’t matter that you were the man that held the belt that Zero McHannon is getting his fingerprints all over daily, nightly, and ever so rightly either. You had it, he has it, and Sunshine Scandalous Tony Carmine will have it. You can like it or hate it, it doesn’t really matter because it’s… well that weird taste you’ve got in your mouth right about now? That’s inevitability, and I’d lay money on it happening. If Tony wants it bad enough, it’s going to happen.” A decisive nod, before Noelle looked up at the camera, her large eyes focused intently.
“I know you’re smarter than you’re given credit for. I also know that you are a better wrestler than you’re given credit for. Strip away the smart remarks, the puff piece fluffing of your current mouthpiece, Quinn Goodrich. He’s responsible for so much of what makes you - you, really right now that I hope you’re paying him what he’s worth...but strip that away, take off the illusion of a gentleman? There’s a hard, mean man who knows right from wrong but doesn’t give a shit, who calculates what he can play off whom, yet somehow? You don’t even see how you’re getting played.” Noelle lightly shook her head. “Johnny, I know too that you’re going to step into the ring with the full intention of hurting me in all the worst ways you can. You know like everyone else that I’ve just come back off of injured reserved. That I had to work hard to get cleared, that I got really lucky that what happened to me wasn’t worse. You, I’m sure of it, want to put me right back on the shelf. You want to shred apart any hope that I have, to continue to do what I love. You want to look down at me on the mat in a bloody and broken heap, and know you were the one that stopped my rise. You couldn’t possibly care less about me as a wrestler, heck if we’re honest you don’t care about me as a person, how I think and feel. You might be marginally aware that Tony does, but that won’t stop you, it won’t make you hesitate for an instant, right?
Noelle, she’s too goody goody to do anything about it. Noelle, she wouldn’t, couldn’t be mean enough to do anything about it. Noelle isn’t brutal enough,” a hint of irony in her tone as she smooths her hands down her sides, highlighting her BRUTALapparel lavender custom shirt. “Johnny, I’m so sure of you right now. You’ll tip your head back and look down your patrician nose at me, and tell me no one in this business hits harder than you, not anyone, no matter what the pundits and taglines might say otherwise. Who cares if there’s ten other guys out there just like you who pride themselves on knocking people out? Right? Because none of them are Johnny Cannon!”
Noelle sharply clapped her hands, then drew them out to rest at her sides again. “Johnny Cannon, you’re not as special as you think you are. Though boy to be honest nobody is as special as you think you are. You cast a long shadow, sure, but you somehow forgot the only way there’s shadow is if something is basking in the Sunshine.”
She snickered softly, looking down at her feet in her expensive leather boots. “Stop it Noelle! Stop it you vapid groupie sloot! Stop talking up Tony! You’re supposed to be talking about ME!” She looked up from under her lashes, gazing hard at the camera. “Am I close? Does it even matter? You’re not Tony, and I’m not a vapid groupie sloot, but perception is everything right? It’s the key in the lock, to open that door to victory, right?
I’m not so sure I buy that, JC. I think that you and people like you? Are selling a bill of goods, everything looks great on paper but you run that through the wash a few times and the ink fades and the shiny comes right off.
You want everyone to think this match between me and you was already in your pocket before either of us even opened our mouths. If I were someone else? I’d say that was nothing but your ego talking, whispering sweet nothings in your ear because my God do you have an ego. I would say that, but honestly? I get the feeling deep down that no one else believes I can beat you either.”
Noelle took a deep breath, squaring her shoulders and shifting her feet before she spoke. “I wish I had a fraction of your ego, simply because of the boost of confidence that comes with something like that, well… on the one hand I do. On the other? I’d rather not drink the poison that comes with it, if it’s all the same to you. I have let go a lot of conceits I had about myself and what I can do. With what I’ve gone through? I had no choice but to do it.
The thing is, even when people out there don’t believe I can beat you? I’m not letting that stop me, Johnny. I’m not going to stay hidden in the back, or at the hotel. I’m going to lace up my boots like always, and I’m going to look myself in the eye in the mirror before I head out for our match because I’ve fought hard to get here, Johnny. I’ve fought hard to change who and what I am, but I know no amount of words are going to prove it. I can only prove it through my actions, and be what I know I am now. It’s that simple, and that hard all at the same time.
But I’m going to do it, because I did work hard to get here and I keep working hard. It’s not a want, and it’s more than a need, more than just a desire to prove something or be the best.”
Noelle paused then paced slightly back and forth. “I can’t remain where I am, Johnny. I have to rise. I have to move forward, improve, evolve. I will not be stagnant, I will not slide down into a garbage bin like you’d want me to, I won’t regress. I refuse to. I’ll take what I learn from my losses and I’ll apply it until I win again - and make no mistake Johnny, I’m going to win again.
Not because I believe I’m better than you, or that I can’t lose, or any number of excuses people want to hide behind. Not me. I own my flaws, I own my past, like it or not it’s what got me here today, standing up in front of this camera, and talking to you like you’ll hear or understand a word I have to say.” A very European shrug, her hands up to gesture as she spoke again.
“Muhammed Ali once said - I don't have to be what you want me to be. Somewhere in my life I forgot that, Johnny. It’s not your fault or anyone else’s fault I did. But what’s your problem, is that I remembered that. So I’m not going to be what you expect when we meet in that ring. I’m not going to be that girl who smiles at people all the time because she’s just happy to be alive and doing what she loves, or who is nice to people because she wants to be, or who sends up cute puppy pictures or gifs of herself dancing on Twitter to cheer up people she likes and respects. That girl will be sitting in the back, waiting for me in the locker when I’m done with this match against you, Johnny.
Safe and sound, safe as houses.
The girl you meet in the ring is going to be the one that has a fire lit under her, in her. I won’t be stopped, I won’t stop, I won’t be denied. I’m hungry, and you’re the one that’s going to try and stand in my way. You can think this match means nothing. That it’s beneath you, that you can already count on that win, that you gain nothing from beating me. That’s fine. It’s just more fuel for me and I’m going to take all I can get.
Everyone thinks I can’t beat you, Johnny Cannon.”
She turns to walk away and pauses, looking back over her shoulder. “Everyone, except me.”
=[off cam]=
September 27 2016
She spent more time in Detroit than one would imagine, really. Sometimes it was a stop for her on the way to somewhere else. An appearance for charity. A meet and greet with fans for FGA. Public appearances to support when the company was touring, getting interest generated for shows, anything to get those tickets out the door. Her smile made her a popular choice for that sort of thing, and she usually didn’t mind doing it one bit. But she wasn’t in Detroit for any of those reasons, even though with minimal effort she could certainly arrange an interview with a locally founded wrestling blog, or get a freelance newspaper writer to talk to her on the phone for an Op-Ed piece about wrestling and what she thought about it, that would get tagged in with a stock photo she’d never remember sitting for.
Today though, she hoped her luck would hold out because she was bringing a present for someone that meant something to her, though she’d never actually sat down and thought about what or how much. He just simply was. The long box sat next to her in the backseat of the Yellow Cab, a bit longer and deeper than the average box for something like this, but one couldn’t just cram custom made spangle covered leather platform boots into just any old box. Her fingers toyed with the ribbons the box was decorated with, idly back and forth as she imagined the look on his face when he saw them, followed by a bite of her lip because she hadn’t phoned or texted first to see if he was even there today. That was the problem with surprises, so easy to want to do them, so easy for outside issues to mess them up.
She let her lip go and sank back into the seat with a sigh. Even if he wasn’t there she was sure someone would let her leave them in his office, and it wasn’t like he was shy, he’d definitely send her a snap of him wearing them. A sharp giggle came then as she thought about the high likelihood that he would send her a picture of him wearing the boots and nothing else, a faint hint of pink on her cheeks as she felt a bit of a blush coming up on her cheekbones. She saw the driver glance at her in the rearview mirror but she looked down fast, pretending to check her phone so he wouldn’t ask her questions. Usually she didn’t mind being sociable, even to a stranger like the cab driver, but right now inhabiting her thoughts until she could talk to someone that understood her felt like the smart thing to do.
His voice brought her out of that reverie though, letting her know that they’d arrived at the RISE gym, and she fished out cash to pay for the ride and a tip. She asked if he’d wait about ten minutes before leaving - if he was there, she’d stay if not she’d need a ride to the hotel. The cabbie shrugged and told her if she wanted to pay him for his time he’d do it, and she barely managed to keep from rolling her eyes as she handed him another twenty. Either way, it’d be worth it.
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Word Count: 3428