Coaxing Secrets (Five-Way Fray)
Sept 15, 2016 13:49:20 GMT -5
Post by Noelle Smith on Sept 15, 2016 13:49:20 GMT -5
=[off cam]=
September 13 2016
He’d coaxed her out of the gym with a promise of espresso - he knew things, for example he knew she’d doubled up on her training after she’d marched that fine backside of hers down that ramp and confronted not just her past to a degree, but where she saw herself in the future. It was taking the first step on a journey, and she’d found that bravery to do it. It should be a daunting task for anyone to overcome, but for Noelle who had had some of the worst luck the past two years it should have been impossible. She should have frozen backstage, she should have turned around and hid in her locker. She should have done what so many expected her to do, and fail at the get-go, but she didn’t. She stepped out from the safety of the shadows, and she shone in front of that crowd, soaking in their cheers and something inside of her had clicked even if it was just for those few moments.
It was a process, though. He looked at her sitting there across the tiny real marble topped table at the coffee shop he’d picked, high-end and exclusive - tucked away down a small side alley, if you didn’t know it was there you’d never have guessed. But once inside? Luxury, from the decor to the smell of some of the best coffee beans in the world that were roasted on site. She looked so tiny and subdued right then, sitting across from him, for someone that had such a vibrant soul. He tried for a neutral look, but the kindness she saw in him was in his voice when he spoke and reached over to take her hand. He counted it as a huge step forward that when he did, she seemed to blossom up and gave him a smile even though his words weren’t as pleasant as he’d have liked.
“Someone, somewhere. Moi wonders Noelle, who was it that you looked up to and respected that told you to repress who you are? Who was it that told you ‘shut up, nobody cares’...” his voice was a low murmur. “They were wrong, for that and everything else.”
He watched her dark eyes widen in surprise, her answer easily read without her speaking a word. She searched his face for something, and apparently saw what she needed to before she spoke, equally as soft. “I was going to ask you how you knew, Kamijo. But I think it’s enough that you cared enough to figure it out. Isn’t that strange?”
For not the first time, Noelle simply looked at him. Not the gorgeous trappings, the jewelry that gleamed where it adorned him, the very fine elegant clothes that spoke of antique elegance, the tonsorial splendour of his hair. All of these things led to a pleasant visual, but it was the man underneath all that, that she truly respected.
[Online Blog: Noelleicious.com]
Everything Has A Price
Hello FGA Fans!
We just keep moving forward don’t we? I was happily successful in my first match back. That sets a good tone for my return, but it’s just not enough. My opponent wasn’t as advertised, but I’m not dwelling on that now. I can’t afford to look back, not really. Everything is touched by softer edges now, it’s in the past. Things that made an impact then, aren’t registering now. Not in the way they used to, but honestly it’s not a bad thing to know when to let go.
But just because I’m not looking back, it doesn’t mean I suddenly forgot what happened. I’ve just learned how to cut the tethers that were holding me down, and holding me back. It wasn’t an easy lesson, but it was worth the effort it took to get there and I can’t thank the people who helped me along the way enough.
I got shook, even before I got hurt. I can say that now with all the distance and softened edges and not bat an eye. I doubted. Not just myself, but what I could accomplish in this sport as a whole, not just Frontier Grappling Arts. That’s a dark, dark place to be when something you love starts to weigh on you.
But I did learn, and that’s the important part. I learned, I grew, I moved forward. I evolved. Now that I’ve learned that lesson I’m not going to stop. I won’t stagnate. I won’t fall to the wayside. I won’t, because I refuse to accept that.
All the words that certain people strike at me with, mean even less to me now than they did before. Spew that venom out on social media, it doesn’t change a thing, and it doesn’t change me.
For you fans who have stuck by me no matter what was said about me, no matter what happened, I think you deserve the biggest thanks of all, and to give you that I’m going to do better than my best. Just watch me, I got this.
#MuchLove
Noelle
=[on cam]=
Noelle Smith stepped in front of a low bench before she perched herself delicately on it, crossing her long dancer’s legs at the knee and resting her slim hands on the denim of her jeans. Her skin had a glow on it that spoke of health, or at least really, really skilfully applied makeup, but there was nothing artificial seeming about her easy smile as she looked down at her hands, a trick of the sunlight filtering down through the lattice roof of the outdoor cafe patio catching a gleam of gold glitter that looked a little bit like a “K” for a brief instant. She sat up straighter and looked directly at the camera, her voice seeming oddly perky for a brief instant.
“Surprise! Well, maybe not that big of a surprise for some of you. But a Five-Way Fray, now that’s a tiny bit different than what you usually see even on Vertigo where just about anything could happen and often does. We came out, had our say to an extent. We made our bold choices, and the Champion didn’t waver - because that’s how this story is supposed to go. Savannah Taylor, Evan Envi, Mark Storm, Molly Reid, and me. Now I’m almost certain that those little chattery mice chewing the wiring in the walls have been talking behind my back non stop since I stepped out from behind that curtain and said I wanted a go with Fujiko over the Pride title. Those mice need to learn that what they say just doesn’t matter the way they think it does. Now the Pride title, it’s something I need, you see. I thought about it a lot while I was gone and letting my injuries heal. How that shining golden symbol had been something to focus on, something to be strived for, to invest in. A focus, as it were.”
Her gaze didn’t waver, the dappled sunlight giving her eyes a shadowed look as she kept speaking.
“I’m sure you… the fans, my opponents in this match were a little surprised when I stepped out and made my way to the ring. The Noelle of old wouldn’t have tried to cut in line for… well, just about anything.” Her soulful eyes narrowed. “The harder I worked to do things the right way, the more some of you doubted me, but you know what was the worst part? You pile on enough shade, enough grief, enough bad even the best is going to stumble. I’ve never said that I was the best, that I was untouchable, that I had no emotions coming into a match. But I always at least tried to keep it professional even if there were times I failed there too. But I’m done with that. I’m done with being treated as a doormat by people who never had my best interests at heart. I’m done with letting myself be what everyone told me to be, or tearing myself up to be something I never was and could never be.
That’s done. I should have kept to my heart the best piece of advice I’ve ever gotten in this business, and that’s to lock up my emotions before every match and no matter how much I care about someone, or loathe someone, to set that all aside and just be a wrestler who gets into the ring and the passion shown is for what I do there and not how I feel about things that have nothing to do with the match I’m in. It’s so simple, when we break it down. We all want to win, at the end of the day. Some of us are willing to go further to achieve that than others are. That’s fine. I used to be one of those that it took a really bad thing to happen for me to get that fire lit under me.
Like that first time I should have won the Mid-Atlantic Legacy title. I was outraged, I felt cheated and used, and that pain and disappointment I used to carry me through my next shot at it, when Fujiko and I put on an amazing ladder match.”
She curved her lips slightly, Fujiko could front a little if she wanted about that victory Noelle had over her being somehow ‘less’ because there were ladders involved, but the truth was the truth.
“Say what you want about our current Pride Champion, but she’s still here and she’s still carrying gold. That says volumes doesn’t it?”
Noelle nodded firmly though her attention seemed captured a moment by something out of range of the camera.
“Now most of us in this match? We’ve been working - at least, I’ve been working,” her fingers gripped the front of her BRUTALapparel t-shirt, that soft custom purple they made just for Noelle. “I’ll be generous and say the rest of you likely are too, even if it’s just between whatever media circus is at the forefront for at least one of you. Hmm. Does that sound like a shot at my ex, Evan Harrison? Oh sorry, Evan Envi the Source of Hope, the Light For the Huddled Masses, Mr. You Suck and Shut Up?
I certainly hope it does, because it was. Evan, your nose has always been up in someone’s business. People want to say Molly Reid is a starfucker, a leech, a blight, a copycat and worse - because people will say anything when they’re trying to get attention on social media to be honest. Does that make it true? Molly will quite ably get up and defend her damn self as she has time and again against Zero McHannon, our FGA Big Kahuna. He may not be the only one giving her guff but he’s sure the loudest and most dogged. He’s had some choice things to say about Molly, about me too.
Does that make any of it true, just because someone with a little more stroke and a little more gold and a lot more attitude says so? Because if you look, they say much worse about Evan than we ever usually see.” She idly tapped her chin as she looked up at the sky, then shook her head looking right at the camera.
“His biggest problem with me has nothing to do with his idea that I’m some groupie. He’s just pissed because he wakes up every day as Zero McHannon. We all give him more attention than he deserves on Twitter but I know, I know. It’s hard to ignore it when people bray at you on Twitter… right, Evan?” Noelle winked and shook her head again.
“I’ve said it and I’ll say it again - Mark Storm? He handles you like a pro Evan. He took your insulting him and made it a thing, he laughed with the joke instead of letting you turn him into one with just words, which is a good thing considering he beat you. But hold up, pause. Because he beat you, he is suddenly a whole lot more interesting to me and I don’t mean how you think I mean or how other people are going to think I mean. Because you know what? No matter how much shade I throw at you, that you earn every time you open your mouth or run those sticky fingers? Nothing and no one is going to take away that you are actually good in the ring. That you are actually as good as you say you are.
Minds blown yet?
But being able to recognize what you’re capable of and what you’ve done doesn’t mean that I’m afraid of you, Evan. I’m not afraid of anyone in this match, but if I was? It definitely wouldn’t be your sly digging ass.”
The eyeroll was subtle but it was definitely there. She uncrossed her legs and stood smoothly, pacing just a little bit in front of the bench.
“Savannah Taylor, her I wanted to face for awhile now. See I watched the shows while I was away and she was on a list of people I hoped I’d get to face,” Noelle’s smile bloomed brilliantly. “And I know the old song says, you can’t always get what you want, but here we are. I’m getting something I wanted, taking a chance to get what I need. Now that? That I like.”
She shook her hips in time with the music in her head and laughed a little.
“No matter how hard some people try, that joy is back with me. The funny thing about joy is that you can feel it from the strangest things. Right now mine is coming from the fact that I am in this match getting a whole lot of what I want. I’m getting to face people I haven’t gotten the chance to before, and considering how close I was to never having that chance? It’s like my birthday and Christmas all rolled up without the stupid combo cards that people with birthdays around holidays get stuck with. Mark Storm, Savannah Taylor, Molly Reid? I’m ecstatic, I’m delighted, I’m bringing the joyful noise to this match because of all of you. Thank you for that. The fact is that Evan being Evan means that if I’m not the one kicking and punching him one of you will be? My God people it’s like the cherry on top of the hot fudge sundae. Best believe that I want a go at that fool though. After everything, for him to act such a child toward me? I give him the credit he’s due as a wrestler, but as a human being he’s pretty much a giant pile of fail, ten pounds of sad in a five pound bag.
Look how he does people. He latches on with his thirsty ways and does the most outrageous things all in the name of ‘trying to advance their careers, as a friend’ and Molly is his latest victim. It wasn’t all that long ago he was ‘helping’ Rex Evans too. Sure, that turned out a bit better for him than it did for Molly but he had the advantage of knowing Evan for a really long time where Molly hasn’t. He doesn’t listen, and that’s a fact. But he does learn, and that’s why he’s dangerous.
Hell half of the stupid things he does are to gather intel on people he means to elevate or destroy, he is kind of Machiavellian that way.”
Noelle sighed deeply but drew in a breath and squared her shoulders.
“I know I’ve spent a lot of time and words on Evan Envi. We’ve got history, and a lot of it I truly cringe on looking back now. At least I learned from my mistakes there, I can be taught though honestly I wish someone had taken me by the shoulders and shook me like a British Nanny after I stuck by him. I always thought the deficiency was me, you know? That if I tried harder to be a better person, a better girlfriend then he’d be a better man, that he’d change. It wasn’t all bad times. It wasn’t. But that’s why there is a touch of personal in this match where I want it to be all business.
But I learned, and that’s the problem that you all will be dealing with right now. I’m going to keep professional as I can, because if I let the personal go to my head the result will be me losing this match, this chance, this shot at the Pride title that Fujiko Mine has and I don’t want to lose. I can’t stress enough that while we all want the gold and glory on some level that I don’t need to explain, I need this shot at her, at Fujiko, in ways that the rest of you don’t. I’m not saying that you all don’t want it, I know you do. Savannah most of all I think will understand where I’m coming from here. I lost time, I lost ground, and I almost lost everything and I can’t slack. Not now, not ever again.
If I don’t win this match it won’t be the end of my career, the end of my world, and it surely won’t be the only time I get to grab at it again. But that’s nebulous, that’s too far ahead and I need to keep focus on the now.”
She lifted her arm, and turned it so the watch around her wrist - a man’s watch, but she wore it well, reflected light at the camera. When that flash cleared she was already stepping away, moving on to the next thing she had on her list for the day. There was always something. A media appearance to promote her next match. A meet and greet for charity, repping both FGA and BRUTALapparel. A never-ending merry-go-round, but for now her stride was steady and she threw all she had into it.
=[off cam]=
September 15 2016
Noelle had chosen to pay for her own hotel (or most of it) because she actually liked Hyatt House over the one that the wrestlers were encouraged to use. It was worth it however, because this had bigger singles rooms and a much better gym. She was running the treadmill right now, sweat soaking her shirt and her eyes half closed as her thoughts ran faster than even her legs.
I know I’m ready. I know I am. I’ve done everything right. So why can’t I shake this feeling that I’m missing something? Some key piece of the puzzle?
While she worked out, her bag sat on a nearby bench, close enough she could keep an eye on it and make sure no one would trot out of there with her phone or her door key-card. Even so, she missed her phone lighting up, signaling the incoming call.
When she finished and gathered her things she noted it, swiping her thumb over the screen to light it up and see if she had any messages - she did, two missed calls and a text. The text made her smile, because of who it was from. The missed calls though, both unknown numbers and no voicemail left. Usually she’d have thought ‘telemarketer’ but something about these bugged her and she left them in the ‘missed’ section instead of deleting them - just in case.
=[tbc]=
Any character who appears is used with permission.
Word Count: 3270
September 13 2016
He’d coaxed her out of the gym with a promise of espresso - he knew things, for example he knew she’d doubled up on her training after she’d marched that fine backside of hers down that ramp and confronted not just her past to a degree, but where she saw herself in the future. It was taking the first step on a journey, and she’d found that bravery to do it. It should be a daunting task for anyone to overcome, but for Noelle who had had some of the worst luck the past two years it should have been impossible. She should have frozen backstage, she should have turned around and hid in her locker. She should have done what so many expected her to do, and fail at the get-go, but she didn’t. She stepped out from the safety of the shadows, and she shone in front of that crowd, soaking in their cheers and something inside of her had clicked even if it was just for those few moments.
It was a process, though. He looked at her sitting there across the tiny real marble topped table at the coffee shop he’d picked, high-end and exclusive - tucked away down a small side alley, if you didn’t know it was there you’d never have guessed. But once inside? Luxury, from the decor to the smell of some of the best coffee beans in the world that were roasted on site. She looked so tiny and subdued right then, sitting across from him, for someone that had such a vibrant soul. He tried for a neutral look, but the kindness she saw in him was in his voice when he spoke and reached over to take her hand. He counted it as a huge step forward that when he did, she seemed to blossom up and gave him a smile even though his words weren’t as pleasant as he’d have liked.
“Someone, somewhere. Moi wonders Noelle, who was it that you looked up to and respected that told you to repress who you are? Who was it that told you ‘shut up, nobody cares’...” his voice was a low murmur. “They were wrong, for that and everything else.”
He watched her dark eyes widen in surprise, her answer easily read without her speaking a word. She searched his face for something, and apparently saw what she needed to before she spoke, equally as soft. “I was going to ask you how you knew, Kamijo. But I think it’s enough that you cared enough to figure it out. Isn’t that strange?”
For not the first time, Noelle simply looked at him. Not the gorgeous trappings, the jewelry that gleamed where it adorned him, the very fine elegant clothes that spoke of antique elegance, the tonsorial splendour of his hair. All of these things led to a pleasant visual, but it was the man underneath all that, that she truly respected.
[Online Blog: Noelleicious.com]
Everything Has A Price
Hello FGA Fans!
We just keep moving forward don’t we? I was happily successful in my first match back. That sets a good tone for my return, but it’s just not enough. My opponent wasn’t as advertised, but I’m not dwelling on that now. I can’t afford to look back, not really. Everything is touched by softer edges now, it’s in the past. Things that made an impact then, aren’t registering now. Not in the way they used to, but honestly it’s not a bad thing to know when to let go.
But just because I’m not looking back, it doesn’t mean I suddenly forgot what happened. I’ve just learned how to cut the tethers that were holding me down, and holding me back. It wasn’t an easy lesson, but it was worth the effort it took to get there and I can’t thank the people who helped me along the way enough.
I got shook, even before I got hurt. I can say that now with all the distance and softened edges and not bat an eye. I doubted. Not just myself, but what I could accomplish in this sport as a whole, not just Frontier Grappling Arts. That’s a dark, dark place to be when something you love starts to weigh on you.
But I did learn, and that’s the important part. I learned, I grew, I moved forward. I evolved. Now that I’ve learned that lesson I’m not going to stop. I won’t stagnate. I won’t fall to the wayside. I won’t, because I refuse to accept that.
All the words that certain people strike at me with, mean even less to me now than they did before. Spew that venom out on social media, it doesn’t change a thing, and it doesn’t change me.
For you fans who have stuck by me no matter what was said about me, no matter what happened, I think you deserve the biggest thanks of all, and to give you that I’m going to do better than my best. Just watch me, I got this.
#MuchLove
Noelle
=[on cam]=
Noelle Smith stepped in front of a low bench before she perched herself delicately on it, crossing her long dancer’s legs at the knee and resting her slim hands on the denim of her jeans. Her skin had a glow on it that spoke of health, or at least really, really skilfully applied makeup, but there was nothing artificial seeming about her easy smile as she looked down at her hands, a trick of the sunlight filtering down through the lattice roof of the outdoor cafe patio catching a gleam of gold glitter that looked a little bit like a “K” for a brief instant. She sat up straighter and looked directly at the camera, her voice seeming oddly perky for a brief instant.
“Surprise! Well, maybe not that big of a surprise for some of you. But a Five-Way Fray, now that’s a tiny bit different than what you usually see even on Vertigo where just about anything could happen and often does. We came out, had our say to an extent. We made our bold choices, and the Champion didn’t waver - because that’s how this story is supposed to go. Savannah Taylor, Evan Envi, Mark Storm, Molly Reid, and me. Now I’m almost certain that those little chattery mice chewing the wiring in the walls have been talking behind my back non stop since I stepped out from behind that curtain and said I wanted a go with Fujiko over the Pride title. Those mice need to learn that what they say just doesn’t matter the way they think it does. Now the Pride title, it’s something I need, you see. I thought about it a lot while I was gone and letting my injuries heal. How that shining golden symbol had been something to focus on, something to be strived for, to invest in. A focus, as it were.”
Her gaze didn’t waver, the dappled sunlight giving her eyes a shadowed look as she kept speaking.
“I’m sure you… the fans, my opponents in this match were a little surprised when I stepped out and made my way to the ring. The Noelle of old wouldn’t have tried to cut in line for… well, just about anything.” Her soulful eyes narrowed. “The harder I worked to do things the right way, the more some of you doubted me, but you know what was the worst part? You pile on enough shade, enough grief, enough bad even the best is going to stumble. I’ve never said that I was the best, that I was untouchable, that I had no emotions coming into a match. But I always at least tried to keep it professional even if there were times I failed there too. But I’m done with that. I’m done with being treated as a doormat by people who never had my best interests at heart. I’m done with letting myself be what everyone told me to be, or tearing myself up to be something I never was and could never be.
That’s done. I should have kept to my heart the best piece of advice I’ve ever gotten in this business, and that’s to lock up my emotions before every match and no matter how much I care about someone, or loathe someone, to set that all aside and just be a wrestler who gets into the ring and the passion shown is for what I do there and not how I feel about things that have nothing to do with the match I’m in. It’s so simple, when we break it down. We all want to win, at the end of the day. Some of us are willing to go further to achieve that than others are. That’s fine. I used to be one of those that it took a really bad thing to happen for me to get that fire lit under me.
Like that first time I should have won the Mid-Atlantic Legacy title. I was outraged, I felt cheated and used, and that pain and disappointment I used to carry me through my next shot at it, when Fujiko and I put on an amazing ladder match.”
She curved her lips slightly, Fujiko could front a little if she wanted about that victory Noelle had over her being somehow ‘less’ because there were ladders involved, but the truth was the truth.
“Say what you want about our current Pride Champion, but she’s still here and she’s still carrying gold. That says volumes doesn’t it?”
Noelle nodded firmly though her attention seemed captured a moment by something out of range of the camera.
“Now most of us in this match? We’ve been working - at least, I’ve been working,” her fingers gripped the front of her BRUTALapparel t-shirt, that soft custom purple they made just for Noelle. “I’ll be generous and say the rest of you likely are too, even if it’s just between whatever media circus is at the forefront for at least one of you. Hmm. Does that sound like a shot at my ex, Evan Harrison? Oh sorry, Evan Envi the Source of Hope, the Light For the Huddled Masses, Mr. You Suck and Shut Up?
I certainly hope it does, because it was. Evan, your nose has always been up in someone’s business. People want to say Molly Reid is a starfucker, a leech, a blight, a copycat and worse - because people will say anything when they’re trying to get attention on social media to be honest. Does that make it true? Molly will quite ably get up and defend her damn self as she has time and again against Zero McHannon, our FGA Big Kahuna. He may not be the only one giving her guff but he’s sure the loudest and most dogged. He’s had some choice things to say about Molly, about me too.
Does that make any of it true, just because someone with a little more stroke and a little more gold and a lot more attitude says so? Because if you look, they say much worse about Evan than we ever usually see.” She idly tapped her chin as she looked up at the sky, then shook her head looking right at the camera.
“His biggest problem with me has nothing to do with his idea that I’m some groupie. He’s just pissed because he wakes up every day as Zero McHannon. We all give him more attention than he deserves on Twitter but I know, I know. It’s hard to ignore it when people bray at you on Twitter… right, Evan?” Noelle winked and shook her head again.
“I’ve said it and I’ll say it again - Mark Storm? He handles you like a pro Evan. He took your insulting him and made it a thing, he laughed with the joke instead of letting you turn him into one with just words, which is a good thing considering he beat you. But hold up, pause. Because he beat you, he is suddenly a whole lot more interesting to me and I don’t mean how you think I mean or how other people are going to think I mean. Because you know what? No matter how much shade I throw at you, that you earn every time you open your mouth or run those sticky fingers? Nothing and no one is going to take away that you are actually good in the ring. That you are actually as good as you say you are.
Minds blown yet?
But being able to recognize what you’re capable of and what you’ve done doesn’t mean that I’m afraid of you, Evan. I’m not afraid of anyone in this match, but if I was? It definitely wouldn’t be your sly digging ass.”
The eyeroll was subtle but it was definitely there. She uncrossed her legs and stood smoothly, pacing just a little bit in front of the bench.
“Savannah Taylor, her I wanted to face for awhile now. See I watched the shows while I was away and she was on a list of people I hoped I’d get to face,” Noelle’s smile bloomed brilliantly. “And I know the old song says, you can’t always get what you want, but here we are. I’m getting something I wanted, taking a chance to get what I need. Now that? That I like.”
She shook her hips in time with the music in her head and laughed a little.
“No matter how hard some people try, that joy is back with me. The funny thing about joy is that you can feel it from the strangest things. Right now mine is coming from the fact that I am in this match getting a whole lot of what I want. I’m getting to face people I haven’t gotten the chance to before, and considering how close I was to never having that chance? It’s like my birthday and Christmas all rolled up without the stupid combo cards that people with birthdays around holidays get stuck with. Mark Storm, Savannah Taylor, Molly Reid? I’m ecstatic, I’m delighted, I’m bringing the joyful noise to this match because of all of you. Thank you for that. The fact is that Evan being Evan means that if I’m not the one kicking and punching him one of you will be? My God people it’s like the cherry on top of the hot fudge sundae. Best believe that I want a go at that fool though. After everything, for him to act such a child toward me? I give him the credit he’s due as a wrestler, but as a human being he’s pretty much a giant pile of fail, ten pounds of sad in a five pound bag.
Look how he does people. He latches on with his thirsty ways and does the most outrageous things all in the name of ‘trying to advance their careers, as a friend’ and Molly is his latest victim. It wasn’t all that long ago he was ‘helping’ Rex Evans too. Sure, that turned out a bit better for him than it did for Molly but he had the advantage of knowing Evan for a really long time where Molly hasn’t. He doesn’t listen, and that’s a fact. But he does learn, and that’s why he’s dangerous.
Hell half of the stupid things he does are to gather intel on people he means to elevate or destroy, he is kind of Machiavellian that way.”
Noelle sighed deeply but drew in a breath and squared her shoulders.
“I know I’ve spent a lot of time and words on Evan Envi. We’ve got history, and a lot of it I truly cringe on looking back now. At least I learned from my mistakes there, I can be taught though honestly I wish someone had taken me by the shoulders and shook me like a British Nanny after I stuck by him. I always thought the deficiency was me, you know? That if I tried harder to be a better person, a better girlfriend then he’d be a better man, that he’d change. It wasn’t all bad times. It wasn’t. But that’s why there is a touch of personal in this match where I want it to be all business.
But I learned, and that’s the problem that you all will be dealing with right now. I’m going to keep professional as I can, because if I let the personal go to my head the result will be me losing this match, this chance, this shot at the Pride title that Fujiko Mine has and I don’t want to lose. I can’t stress enough that while we all want the gold and glory on some level that I don’t need to explain, I need this shot at her, at Fujiko, in ways that the rest of you don’t. I’m not saying that you all don’t want it, I know you do. Savannah most of all I think will understand where I’m coming from here. I lost time, I lost ground, and I almost lost everything and I can’t slack. Not now, not ever again.
If I don’t win this match it won’t be the end of my career, the end of my world, and it surely won’t be the only time I get to grab at it again. But that’s nebulous, that’s too far ahead and I need to keep focus on the now.”
She lifted her arm, and turned it so the watch around her wrist - a man’s watch, but she wore it well, reflected light at the camera. When that flash cleared she was already stepping away, moving on to the next thing she had on her list for the day. There was always something. A media appearance to promote her next match. A meet and greet for charity, repping both FGA and BRUTALapparel. A never-ending merry-go-round, but for now her stride was steady and she threw all she had into it.
=[off cam]=
September 15 2016
Noelle had chosen to pay for her own hotel (or most of it) because she actually liked Hyatt House over the one that the wrestlers were encouraged to use. It was worth it however, because this had bigger singles rooms and a much better gym. She was running the treadmill right now, sweat soaking her shirt and her eyes half closed as her thoughts ran faster than even her legs.
I know I’m ready. I know I am. I’ve done everything right. So why can’t I shake this feeling that I’m missing something? Some key piece of the puzzle?
While she worked out, her bag sat on a nearby bench, close enough she could keep an eye on it and make sure no one would trot out of there with her phone or her door key-card. Even so, she missed her phone lighting up, signaling the incoming call.
When she finished and gathered her things she noted it, swiping her thumb over the screen to light it up and see if she had any messages - she did, two missed calls and a text. The text made her smile, because of who it was from. The missed calls though, both unknown numbers and no voicemail left. Usually she’d have thought ‘telemarketer’ but something about these bugged her and she left them in the ‘missed’ section instead of deleting them - just in case.
=[tbc]=
Any character who appears is used with permission.
Word Count: 3270