Catfished
Aug 9, 2016 15:22:13 GMT -5
Post by Perello on Aug 9, 2016 15:22:13 GMT -5
“I CAN’T BELIEVE THAT JUST HAPPENED TO ME!!!”
Cameras were on the scene when a sharply dressed Prince MacRear showed up at the Lions Den gym. His vanilla white tuxedo caught the eyes of everyone he walked past, getting the self-proclaimed Sultan of Selfies to look back at them with a scowl.
“WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?! I KNOW I LOOK AMAAAAAAZING SO YOU DON’T HAVE TO LOOK AT ME! HAVE YOU NEVER SEEN A SHARPLY DRESSED MAN IN A SUIT BEFORE!?”
Prince stomped his feet, his eyes filling with rage as he turned toward the camera and let out a grunt.
“WHERE IS MILO DANVERS?! I NEED TO SPEAK WITH THAT NASTY RIGHT THIS SECOND!”
MacRear ripped his loafers off of his feet and walked deeper inside the gym, not stopping until he heard the cameraman’s voice.
“Prince...Uh… why are you looking for Mylo Danvers of all people?” the cameraman asked, “you two don’t seem like you’d… connect as friends.”
“WE’RE NOT FRIENDS YOU NASTY! HE WAS SUPPOSED TO DO ME A FAVOR AND HE SET ME UP!” the brash Carolina Cup winner screamed, “I NEED TO FIND HIM OR PEACHES! IF I SEE EITHER OF THEM I’M KNOCKING THEM ON THEIR MACREAR!”
After a few seconds of silence, MacRear reached the weight room door and pulled it open. He stepped right inside and screamed, “MYLO! WHY DID YOU DO THAT TO ME, HUH?! I KNOW YOU’RE HERE!”
The camera crew followed MacRear inside, curiously waiting for him to state what exactly Milo did.
“YOU SAID YOU WOULD HOOK ME UP WITH A FINE PIECE OF BOOTY, AND YOU SET ME UP WITH A WALRUS! SHE WAS A HUMAN WALRUS, MYLO!”
“He was catfished?!” one of the cameramen blurted out, getting MacRear’s attention immediately.
“YAAAAAS, I WAS CATFISHED YOU NASTIES! MYLO DANVERS WAS SUPPOSED TO SET ME UP WITH THE WOMAN OF MY DREAMS! SOMEONE AS SEXY AS THE BARONESS, BUT AS ELEGANT AS MOTHER! AND YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SET ME UP WITH?!”
MacRear reached into his pants pocket, pulling out his phone to reveal a photo.
“DO YOU SEEEEEEE IT?! DO YOU SEE THAT HIDEOUS THING! THAT’S NOT A REGULAR NASTY, NASTIES! THAT’S EMPRESS NASTY!”
The camera zoomed in on the picture, noticing that behind the beard, it looked like a familiar LDFC face.
“Is--is that Peaches with a beard?!” the cameraman asked, watching as MacRear pulled his phone back toward his face and scowled.
“OKAY, NASTIES! NOW I KNOOOOW PEACHES IS A HIDEOUS CREATURE HERSELF, BUT COMPARING HER TO THIS… THIS… THING?! EVEN I WOULDN’T DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT AND I’M MEANEST MEAN BOY IN THIS ENTIRE PLACE! YOU CAN'T MANIPEDI WITH ME, MMMMKAY?”
MacRear slid his phone back into his pocket and looked around the weight room once more, still hoping to find Mylo Danvers.
“But you know what? THAT might be a good look for Peaches after I’m done with her at Pride! She’s going to want to cover her bruises and fat lip up with a DISGUSTING BEARD LIKE THAT BECAUSE HER FACE WILL BE PULVERIZED BY ME! AND YOU WANNA KNOW WHO SHE COULD BLAME FOR THAT?!” he tapped his foot off the ground and crossed his arms.
“MYLO DANVERS! IF IT WASN’T FOR HIM, I’D STILL BE IN GOOD MOOD! I’D BE CELEBRATING, AND I PROBABLY WOULD’VE TOOK THE TIME TO APPLAUD PEACHES FOR HAVING A MEDIOCRE CAREER THUS FAR! BUT NOPE! NONE OF THAT!! NONE OF THAT BECAUSE I WAS CAAAAAAAAAAAT…FIIIIIIIIIIIIISHED!!!” he yelped, his eyes filling up with tears. “I JUST WANT SOMEONE TO LOVE ME FOR ME AND MYLO SAID HE HAD THE PERFECT CANDIDATE! NOW HE’S GOING TO TELL EVERYONE WHAT HE DID AND I’M GOING TO BE THE LAUGHING STOCK OF LDFC AGAIN!!!”
“Uh, Prince…” the cameraman interrupted, “We’re recording this right now. It’s gonna air on Axxess before the show…”
The Carolina Cup winners eyes went wide as he pushed forward and reached out for the camera. “NO! NO NO NO NO NO! YOU CAN’T DO THAT! THAT’S INVASION OF PRIVACY, NASTIES! DON’T THINK I WON’T CALL THE POLICE AND TELL ON YOU! MOTHER SAYS THAT TELLING DOESN’T MAKE YOU BAD, IT MAKES YOU HONEST!”
Knowing that MacRear wouldn’t let them leave without a fight, one of the members of the camera team thought fast and came up with a way to distract the Sultan.
“Prince! Is that Mylo?!”
“WHERE?!”
Just as MacRear turned his head, the camera team bolted out of the weight room, leaving with their footage and MacRear irate.
“NO! I’M GOING TO SHAVE YOUR HEADS BALD YOU CREATURES! YOU’LL SEEEEEEEEE!”
Cameras were on the scene when a sharply dressed Prince MacRear showed up at the Lions Den gym. His vanilla white tuxedo caught the eyes of everyone he walked past, getting the self-proclaimed Sultan of Selfies to look back at them with a scowl.
“WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?! I KNOW I LOOK AMAAAAAAZING SO YOU DON’T HAVE TO LOOK AT ME! HAVE YOU NEVER SEEN A SHARPLY DRESSED MAN IN A SUIT BEFORE!?”
Prince stomped his feet, his eyes filling with rage as he turned toward the camera and let out a grunt.
“WHERE IS MILO DANVERS?! I NEED TO SPEAK WITH THAT NASTY RIGHT THIS SECOND!”
MacRear ripped his loafers off of his feet and walked deeper inside the gym, not stopping until he heard the cameraman’s voice.
“Prince...Uh… why are you looking for Mylo Danvers of all people?” the cameraman asked, “you two don’t seem like you’d… connect as friends.”
“WE’RE NOT FRIENDS YOU NASTY! HE WAS SUPPOSED TO DO ME A FAVOR AND HE SET ME UP!” the brash Carolina Cup winner screamed, “I NEED TO FIND HIM OR PEACHES! IF I SEE EITHER OF THEM I’M KNOCKING THEM ON THEIR MACREAR!”
After a few seconds of silence, MacRear reached the weight room door and pulled it open. He stepped right inside and screamed, “MYLO! WHY DID YOU DO THAT TO ME, HUH?! I KNOW YOU’RE HERE!”
The camera crew followed MacRear inside, curiously waiting for him to state what exactly Milo did.
“YOU SAID YOU WOULD HOOK ME UP WITH A FINE PIECE OF BOOTY, AND YOU SET ME UP WITH A WALRUS! SHE WAS A HUMAN WALRUS, MYLO!”
“He was catfished?!” one of the cameramen blurted out, getting MacRear’s attention immediately.
“YAAAAAS, I WAS CATFISHED YOU NASTIES! MYLO DANVERS WAS SUPPOSED TO SET ME UP WITH THE WOMAN OF MY DREAMS! SOMEONE AS SEXY AS THE BARONESS, BUT AS ELEGANT AS MOTHER! AND YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SET ME UP WITH?!”
MacRear reached into his pants pocket, pulling out his phone to reveal a photo.
“DO YOU SEEEEEEE IT?! DO YOU SEE THAT HIDEOUS THING! THAT’S NOT A REGULAR NASTY, NASTIES! THAT’S EMPRESS NASTY!”
The camera zoomed in on the picture, noticing that behind the beard, it looked like a familiar LDFC face.
“Is--is that Peaches with a beard?!” the cameraman asked, watching as MacRear pulled his phone back toward his face and scowled.
“OKAY, NASTIES! NOW I KNOOOOW PEACHES IS A HIDEOUS CREATURE HERSELF, BUT COMPARING HER TO THIS… THIS… THING?! EVEN I WOULDN’T DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT AND I’M MEANEST MEAN BOY IN THIS ENTIRE PLACE! YOU CAN'T MANIPEDI WITH ME, MMMMKAY?”
MacRear slid his phone back into his pocket and looked around the weight room once more, still hoping to find Mylo Danvers.
“But you know what? THAT might be a good look for Peaches after I’m done with her at Pride! She’s going to want to cover her bruises and fat lip up with a DISGUSTING BEARD LIKE THAT BECAUSE HER FACE WILL BE PULVERIZED BY ME! AND YOU WANNA KNOW WHO SHE COULD BLAME FOR THAT?!” he tapped his foot off the ground and crossed his arms.
“MYLO DANVERS! IF IT WASN’T FOR HIM, I’D STILL BE IN GOOD MOOD! I’D BE CELEBRATING, AND I PROBABLY WOULD’VE TOOK THE TIME TO APPLAUD PEACHES FOR HAVING A MEDIOCRE CAREER THUS FAR! BUT NOPE! NONE OF THAT!! NONE OF THAT BECAUSE I WAS CAAAAAAAAAAAT…FIIIIIIIIIIIIISHED!!!” he yelped, his eyes filling up with tears. “I JUST WANT SOMEONE TO LOVE ME FOR ME AND MYLO SAID HE HAD THE PERFECT CANDIDATE! NOW HE’S GOING TO TELL EVERYONE WHAT HE DID AND I’M GOING TO BE THE LAUGHING STOCK OF LDFC AGAIN!!!”
“Uh, Prince…” the cameraman interrupted, “We’re recording this right now. It’s gonna air on Axxess before the show…”
The Carolina Cup winners eyes went wide as he pushed forward and reached out for the camera. “NO! NO NO NO NO NO! YOU CAN’T DO THAT! THAT’S INVASION OF PRIVACY, NASTIES! DON’T THINK I WON’T CALL THE POLICE AND TELL ON YOU! MOTHER SAYS THAT TELLING DOESN’T MAKE YOU BAD, IT MAKES YOU HONEST!”
Knowing that MacRear wouldn’t let them leave without a fight, one of the members of the camera team thought fast and came up with a way to distract the Sultan.
“Prince! Is that Mylo?!”
“WHERE?!”
Just as MacRear turned his head, the camera team bolted out of the weight room, leaving with their footage and MacRear irate.
“NO! I’M GOING TO SHAVE YOUR HEADS BALD YOU CREATURES! YOU’LL SEEEEEEEEE!”
