Break on Through (to the Karma Side)
Apr 14, 2016 17:47:02 GMT -5
Post by Johnny Karma on Apr 14, 2016 17:47:02 GMT -5
2nd April 2016, Philadelphia, PA
In a scene that looks quite familiar, we see Johnny Karma being helped through the 2300 Arena's backstage area by one of the match officials, and he certainly doesn't look to be in good shape: a small trickle of blood is running down his nose, there's a cut on his lip, while his chest and back have a collection of welts in all manner of sizes, shapes and colours. In short, not only does he look like hell, he looks like he's been through hell to look that way.
Having been helped through the curtain and into a well-lit backstage area Karma mumbles something in the official's ear and, with a little hesitation, the official lets him try to walk under his own steam. At first karma's steps are a little wayward, as he has difficulty walking in a straight line and his balance is a little off, which causes Cherry to dash forward to catch him - something she immediately regrets, as the weight of an only partially-conscious Karma losing his balance is a lot heavier than carrying the lights, camera, mic and laptop used to put together an episode of Karmic TV, and she nearly gets flattened...but in that moment Karma manages to catch his balance once again, and he just about manages to place an arm around Cherry's waist to keep her from taking a nasty-looking spill to the sweat-soaked floor
...thanks.
Despite being woozy, Karma manages to regain his bearings and will himself to stand upright - although he's still a little uneasy on his feet, as there's a faint but still noticeable sway as he stands.
How are you feeling J-K?
Not so good.
karma winces, and in that moment he lifts a hand towards his nose and uses a couple of fingers to wipe away the trickle of blood, taking a moment to see the blood on the back of his hand before he wipes it off on his trunks
Let's get you back to the locker room, so you can at least have a sit down.
Sounds like an idea..
With that in mind the pair start to walk towards the locker room, although the beating that Karma has taken means his leaden pace is easily a yard or two slower than Cherry's regular walking pace and he quickly lags behind her, which leads to Cherry having to wait for a couple of seconds for Karma to catch up.
Despite this obvious problem, the pair solider on to reach the locker room, and once they step inside Karma gingerly lowers himself to sit on a nearby bench, discovering his back’s quite a bit stiffer than he was expecting it to be
I’ll tell you one thing, either the three of them eased off in their beatdown this time, or I’m starting to develop a physical tolerance for three guys taking it in turns to put the boots to be.
Karma attempts a reassuring smile, but his intentions get swallowed up by him wincing as another dull throb of pain starts to radiate through his body – which causes Cherry to look concerned
This is the second time you’ve been jumped by The New Kings…
Who?
Carmine, Cannon and Diamond. They call themselves The New Kings.
Sorry, I didn’t have time to ask what they were calling themselves, because somebody was jamming their boot in my ear rather than make introductions.
Karma mutters under his breath for a moment, and his mutterings could be construed as being a bit more TV-14 compared to how he usually speaks
As I was saying, this is the second time they’ve jumped you already, and the Gold Rush Rumble is right around the corner and you know at some point the three of them are going to band together to try and dominate the field, so I have to ask you…well, isn’t it time that you thought of making a few allies in the locker room? I mean, going it alone doesn’t sound like a good idea because there’s three of them and one of you.
Yeah, doesn’t sound too smart to me either. I mean, when was the last time you saw somebody routinely face a numerical disadvantage and still win convincingly?
Only every time we have another Die Hard sequel that the world didn’t need, and it just makes us feel sad having watched it.
I meant something realistic.
But you know what, you’re obviously right, there’s three of them and one of me – and they have shown time and again they have a real bad way of dealing with setbacks, as their usual approach is to rush the ring and beat on anyone who happens to be in their way and kick them when they’re down over and over and over again. And believe me, I’m getting sick and tired of having the three of them whale on me whenever I get in the ring – but there’s a problem, and that problem is the Gold Rush Rumble itself because on one side of the ring is those three with a strategy in place going in, while on the other side of the ring is a bunch of people all thinking about Number One.
It’s not going to be much approaching a few people backstage and suggesting we form an alliance to look after each other if, the second the opportunity arises, their eyes see nothing but the FWA Championship and the person they’re helping out is just as much in the way of it as Carmine, Cannon and Diamond are, because that’s when the heart overrules the head. So it works out quite nicely for those three, because they’ve come together at the perfect time to take the GRR by force.
So what’s the plan J-K?
…
12th April 2016, Karmic TV Studio, NYC
KARMIC TV
Getting ready to RUMBLE!!!
Once we have heard about half a second less of Heroes as Fair Use policies allow, we cut to the Karmic TV studio where Cherry is greeting us with a friendly and enthusiastic wave, while Karma looks a lot less like somebody parked a pickup truck on his face but he still looks a little less than happy as he gives the camera a welcoming nod
Hi guys, welcome to another edition of Karmic TV – and this edition is extra-special because it is the last edition before the most monumental of all FWA annual traditions: J-K proving himself to be the Battle Royal GOD of FWA.
The statistics have spoken for themselves plenty of times: Iron Man and the most eliminations in his GRR debut, the longest time spent in the match of all competitors and the most eliminations of any FWA superstar – the long and the short of it is that, in terms of the Gold Rush Rumble, J-K has so much pedigree he makes the Hamptons look like Mott Haven.
It suddenly occurs to Cherry what she just blurted out
So for everyone who is still watching, firstly if you could apologise to people who live in the Bronx on our behalf that would be great, but more importantly let me hand over to the man who puts the “gold” into “Gold Rush Rumble”, JOHNNY KARMA!
Karma accepts the show being handed to him with a grateful nod in Cherry’s direction
Thank you, Miss Baum.
Cherry mouths words of thanks in return, fluttering her eyelashes as she does so
I am sure that long-time viewers of Karmic TV will be well aware of the last couple of years, where I have put a new spin on the same song a couple of times – and for those of you who have only started following the show more recently, Miss Baum gave you a lyric sheet a moment ago. Yes, the facts do make for good reading in terms of my chances in the Gold Rush Rumble, and if you were a betting man…I hope for your sake you live in a state where that’s legal, because none of us at Karmic TV wish to be held liable in case you get arrested for violating your state laws.
With that in mind, you are also no doubt aware that a few months ago I won a battle royal to become the #1 contender for the FWA Championship, meaning that after so many times where I have done everything but win a battle royal, now I know what it feels like to win one. So I’m sure that a few of you are expecting me to proclaim that everything will fall into place come April 16th and I will take a giant stride towards the title.
Taking a moment of contemplation, Karma looks towards the Pride Championship belt that is sat on a plinth next to his sofa
But that is exactly what I’m not going to do.
Karma leans forward a little bit, making sure he’s making eye contact with the camera before he speaks
What each and every person who is watching this will be fully aware of is how there’s a trio of momzers that have been making a name for themselves by attacking anyone and everyone who prevents them from tasting success. It happened in the immediate aftermath of me defeating Carmine for the Pride Championship, it happened when what they expected to be a dominant first win over Molly Reid, Mark Storm and Nero Darling turned into an anything but dominant loss, and it happened at the last show just when it looked like I was about to prove a second time that I can beat Carmine. That’s how the three of them, who want to call themselves The New Kings, operate – they want to lay a beating on whoever is in their way, and if that person shows them up they will keep beating on them until they get tired.
Yet there’s a difference between those matches and the Gold Rush Rumble: if the three of them decide to rush the ring and put the boots to anyone they can catch even though their number hasn’t been called, there’s nothing to stop them doing that as it’s no DQ. So if at some point in the match there’s two men and Tony Carmine are in the ring, the only thing preventing a little bit of backup from clearing the ring is the incredibly unlikely scenario that either the referees can talk them out of tipping the balance in their favour because they can, or the FWA officials have been hitting the gym much more than we initially believed and they’ll ragdoll them around the arena for daring to taint this most sacred of battle royals. But let’s be honest, since the officials will be standing around the ring rather than competing inside of it, that’s pretty darned unlikely.
So this is the problem: all but three of the entrants should be going into this match knowing that the best way to boost their chances of winning is to prevent Carmine and friends teaming up to thin out the opposition so they can take over the match and get what they want. You’d think that anybody with half a brain would’ve figured that out, but they’re dangling a remarkably powerful carrot in front of everyone. Let me put it this way: if Wrestler A and Wrestler B are the only two people in the ring, they’re won’t hold fire because they know a common enemy is waiting for their name to be called, they’ll both be thinking of a title opportunity the guy on the other side of the ring is standing in the way of. Or you can look at the bigger picture: while on paper it’s three vs a couple of dozen, and from that standpoint you’d think it would be a walkover, those couple of dozen are all taking their own baggage into the match with them, baggage that will throw common sense out of the window if a couple of entrants have some unfinished business – meaning that’s two people Carmine and company won’t have to worry about, and that will give them all the time in the world to find the quickest and most effective way to bundle them out of the match.
Exhaling deeply, Karma leans back before he continues
I know this sounds negative, defeatist even, but let me make it clear that I’m not: what I am saying is that if anyone, not just me, wants to improve their odds of coming out of the Gold Rush Rumble with a win they need to make sure The New Kings can’t dictate the match they want, which will get them the result they want. So I’m not going to assume victory – or, as Cannon would say, tell you a story – if I don’t establish that this story has a villain at the heart of it, and that villain needs to be stopped. And I don’t mean a villain like in Batman Returns, with a plan that makes zero sense and is easily thwarted in the most anticlimactic fashion, I’m talking more batman Begins where the villain has a plan, knows how to execute it, and they’ll be showing up after the ending credits no matter how defeated they look on the night. At the very least, I hope somebody listens to me so they don’t walk out on the ramp, see the three of them in the ring, but think “What the heck” and rush the ring anyway – because that would be more kalye than shelling out for an extended warranty.
Rather than finish right there, Karma leans back a little further and stretches
More than anything else, though, I know that The New Kings have a chink in their armour, and that chink is the fact they are assuming superiority rather than taking it. It happened with their loss to Reid, Storm and Darling a few weeks ago, just as it happened when Carmine’s quest to regain the Pride Championship was doomed to fail so badly that Cannon and Diamond had to hit the ring and save him a second straight loss to yours truly – and if Carmine wants to claim anything else, he’s the one telling stories.
Resistance is the key to removing the threat they pose in the match, and that is key to victory. I’ve shown plenty of times that I am not somebody who is just going to roll over and let whoever wants to talk a big game get the victory they believe is their right, and this must be eating away at Carmine and Cannon because they are the two people who should know this better than anyone else. Because while victory is the thing I crave most in this year’s Rumble, making sure the three of them fail to bully their way to glory comes pretty damn close.
Normally this would be the moment where Karma hands things back to Cherry to wrap up the show, but today is not a normal edition of Karmic TV…
14th April 2016, Coney Island, NYC
We see Karma sat on a bench looking out over the Atlantic ocean that is spread out before him, shielding his eyes from the spring sun that may be enough to make him need to squint but isn’t enough to have him consider taking off the Mets track jacket that is protecting him from the chillier elements in the air, and he’s wondering where the heck Cherry’s got to because she should’ve been here ten minutes ago - which is especially strange as this is her neck of the woods after all
Felling as though he’s either waiting in the wrong place or, more worryingly, something’s wrong Karma pulls out his phone and starts to poke out a message – although compared to Cherry’s quite remarkable HTC-fu, Karma’s attempts at writing a quick text mainly involves him tutting as yet another typo appears on his screen. However, Karma endures and he eventually manages to write the message he intended to write, and in doing so there is a small part of him that is relieved that Cherry didn’t arrive before he’d finished writing it out…again
After sending his text out into the ether, Karma goes back to looking out over the ocean as he awaits a reply, and he finds the sound of the waves crashing against the shore to be relaxing – no matter how much the seagulls try and disrupt his little moment of calm with their incessant chatter. But as Karma sits in his little bubble of relaxation, he hears another sound: it’s faint at first, but it seems to be getting louder, as if it’s…coming closer. It sounds a lot like somebody is banging a couple of objects together in a rhythmic manner, and once the sound starts to get much clearer…
J-K, come out to play-i-ay!
At which point Karma turns around to look behind him, and he sees Cherry has snuck up behind him and on one of her hands she has a glass bottle attached to every other finger, which she has been banging together
Couldn’t resist!
Cherry bats her eyelashes at Karma, giving a kittenish smile as she expends more effort than she expected in trying to get the bottles off of her fingers
You’d be amazed how hard it is to find glass bottles these days, and it’s not like I’m going to root around in the first recycling bin I could find.
Wait a second, you’re telling me you’re late because…you were looking for empty beer bottles?
Well it’s not like I was going to empty three of them on my own. I’m a lady, thank you very much!
Cherry strikes a pose of mock indignation at the thought of chugging that much beer in that little time…hoping that Karma doesn’t feel the need to mention her superhuman ability to demolish shots of Sambuca as if they were water
So what’s on your mind J-K?
I was thinking about what you said, about getting some regular backup to make sure Carmine et al won’t be getting the jump on me every time I so much as sneeze. And then I got thinking about this one time a group of guys found themselves in a bad situation, miles away from home and facing overwhelming odds. I’m pretty sure you know the story I’m talking about…
Karma gestures towards the bottles Cherry has just about managed to remove from her fingers
Anyway, what I’m trying to say is that if what I said the other day on Karmic TV doesn’t hit home, not only am I going to be so utterly pist avek that I couldn’t get a few people to listen to some common sense and make the FWA roster pay a higher price than they can possibly imagine, but things will just get worse and worse until half the roster get sick and tired of the three-on-one beatdowns and go somewhere else, and if we get to a situation where people would rather quit than fight back then I have to wonder why I bothered trying to make FWA a better place.
So what’re you thinking?
Karma looks past Cherry towards the Wonder Wheel that stands at the heart of Luna Park
I think maybe I should look for some people who want to fight.
In a scene that looks quite familiar, we see Johnny Karma being helped through the 2300 Arena's backstage area by one of the match officials, and he certainly doesn't look to be in good shape: a small trickle of blood is running down his nose, there's a cut on his lip, while his chest and back have a collection of welts in all manner of sizes, shapes and colours. In short, not only does he look like hell, he looks like he's been through hell to look that way.
Having been helped through the curtain and into a well-lit backstage area Karma mumbles something in the official's ear and, with a little hesitation, the official lets him try to walk under his own steam. At first karma's steps are a little wayward, as he has difficulty walking in a straight line and his balance is a little off, which causes Cherry to dash forward to catch him - something she immediately regrets, as the weight of an only partially-conscious Karma losing his balance is a lot heavier than carrying the lights, camera, mic and laptop used to put together an episode of Karmic TV, and she nearly gets flattened...but in that moment Karma manages to catch his balance once again, and he just about manages to place an arm around Cherry's waist to keep her from taking a nasty-looking spill to the sweat-soaked floor
...thanks.
Despite being woozy, Karma manages to regain his bearings and will himself to stand upright - although he's still a little uneasy on his feet, as there's a faint but still noticeable sway as he stands.
How are you feeling J-K?
Not so good.
karma winces, and in that moment he lifts a hand towards his nose and uses a couple of fingers to wipe away the trickle of blood, taking a moment to see the blood on the back of his hand before he wipes it off on his trunks
Let's get you back to the locker room, so you can at least have a sit down.
Sounds like an idea..
With that in mind the pair start to walk towards the locker room, although the beating that Karma has taken means his leaden pace is easily a yard or two slower than Cherry's regular walking pace and he quickly lags behind her, which leads to Cherry having to wait for a couple of seconds for Karma to catch up.
Despite this obvious problem, the pair solider on to reach the locker room, and once they step inside Karma gingerly lowers himself to sit on a nearby bench, discovering his back’s quite a bit stiffer than he was expecting it to be
I’ll tell you one thing, either the three of them eased off in their beatdown this time, or I’m starting to develop a physical tolerance for three guys taking it in turns to put the boots to be.
Karma attempts a reassuring smile, but his intentions get swallowed up by him wincing as another dull throb of pain starts to radiate through his body – which causes Cherry to look concerned
This is the second time you’ve been jumped by The New Kings…
Who?
Carmine, Cannon and Diamond. They call themselves The New Kings.
Sorry, I didn’t have time to ask what they were calling themselves, because somebody was jamming their boot in my ear rather than make introductions.
Karma mutters under his breath for a moment, and his mutterings could be construed as being a bit more TV-14 compared to how he usually speaks
As I was saying, this is the second time they’ve jumped you already, and the Gold Rush Rumble is right around the corner and you know at some point the three of them are going to band together to try and dominate the field, so I have to ask you…well, isn’t it time that you thought of making a few allies in the locker room? I mean, going it alone doesn’t sound like a good idea because there’s three of them and one of you.
Yeah, doesn’t sound too smart to me either. I mean, when was the last time you saw somebody routinely face a numerical disadvantage and still win convincingly?
Only every time we have another Die Hard sequel that the world didn’t need, and it just makes us feel sad having watched it.
I meant something realistic.
But you know what, you’re obviously right, there’s three of them and one of me – and they have shown time and again they have a real bad way of dealing with setbacks, as their usual approach is to rush the ring and beat on anyone who happens to be in their way and kick them when they’re down over and over and over again. And believe me, I’m getting sick and tired of having the three of them whale on me whenever I get in the ring – but there’s a problem, and that problem is the Gold Rush Rumble itself because on one side of the ring is those three with a strategy in place going in, while on the other side of the ring is a bunch of people all thinking about Number One.
It’s not going to be much approaching a few people backstage and suggesting we form an alliance to look after each other if, the second the opportunity arises, their eyes see nothing but the FWA Championship and the person they’re helping out is just as much in the way of it as Carmine, Cannon and Diamond are, because that’s when the heart overrules the head. So it works out quite nicely for those three, because they’ve come together at the perfect time to take the GRR by force.
So what’s the plan J-K?
…
12th April 2016, Karmic TV Studio, NYC
KARMIC TV
Getting ready to RUMBLE!!!
Once we have heard about half a second less of Heroes as Fair Use policies allow, we cut to the Karmic TV studio where Cherry is greeting us with a friendly and enthusiastic wave, while Karma looks a lot less like somebody parked a pickup truck on his face but he still looks a little less than happy as he gives the camera a welcoming nod
Hi guys, welcome to another edition of Karmic TV – and this edition is extra-special because it is the last edition before the most monumental of all FWA annual traditions: J-K proving himself to be the Battle Royal GOD of FWA.
The statistics have spoken for themselves plenty of times: Iron Man and the most eliminations in his GRR debut, the longest time spent in the match of all competitors and the most eliminations of any FWA superstar – the long and the short of it is that, in terms of the Gold Rush Rumble, J-K has so much pedigree he makes the Hamptons look like Mott Haven.
It suddenly occurs to Cherry what she just blurted out
So for everyone who is still watching, firstly if you could apologise to people who live in the Bronx on our behalf that would be great, but more importantly let me hand over to the man who puts the “gold” into “Gold Rush Rumble”, JOHNNY KARMA!
Karma accepts the show being handed to him with a grateful nod in Cherry’s direction
Thank you, Miss Baum.
Cherry mouths words of thanks in return, fluttering her eyelashes as she does so
I am sure that long-time viewers of Karmic TV will be well aware of the last couple of years, where I have put a new spin on the same song a couple of times – and for those of you who have only started following the show more recently, Miss Baum gave you a lyric sheet a moment ago. Yes, the facts do make for good reading in terms of my chances in the Gold Rush Rumble, and if you were a betting man…I hope for your sake you live in a state where that’s legal, because none of us at Karmic TV wish to be held liable in case you get arrested for violating your state laws.
With that in mind, you are also no doubt aware that a few months ago I won a battle royal to become the #1 contender for the FWA Championship, meaning that after so many times where I have done everything but win a battle royal, now I know what it feels like to win one. So I’m sure that a few of you are expecting me to proclaim that everything will fall into place come April 16th and I will take a giant stride towards the title.
Taking a moment of contemplation, Karma looks towards the Pride Championship belt that is sat on a plinth next to his sofa
But that is exactly what I’m not going to do.
Karma leans forward a little bit, making sure he’s making eye contact with the camera before he speaks
What each and every person who is watching this will be fully aware of is how there’s a trio of momzers that have been making a name for themselves by attacking anyone and everyone who prevents them from tasting success. It happened in the immediate aftermath of me defeating Carmine for the Pride Championship, it happened when what they expected to be a dominant first win over Molly Reid, Mark Storm and Nero Darling turned into an anything but dominant loss, and it happened at the last show just when it looked like I was about to prove a second time that I can beat Carmine. That’s how the three of them, who want to call themselves The New Kings, operate – they want to lay a beating on whoever is in their way, and if that person shows them up they will keep beating on them until they get tired.
Yet there’s a difference between those matches and the Gold Rush Rumble: if the three of them decide to rush the ring and put the boots to anyone they can catch even though their number hasn’t been called, there’s nothing to stop them doing that as it’s no DQ. So if at some point in the match there’s two men and Tony Carmine are in the ring, the only thing preventing a little bit of backup from clearing the ring is the incredibly unlikely scenario that either the referees can talk them out of tipping the balance in their favour because they can, or the FWA officials have been hitting the gym much more than we initially believed and they’ll ragdoll them around the arena for daring to taint this most sacred of battle royals. But let’s be honest, since the officials will be standing around the ring rather than competing inside of it, that’s pretty darned unlikely.
So this is the problem: all but three of the entrants should be going into this match knowing that the best way to boost their chances of winning is to prevent Carmine and friends teaming up to thin out the opposition so they can take over the match and get what they want. You’d think that anybody with half a brain would’ve figured that out, but they’re dangling a remarkably powerful carrot in front of everyone. Let me put it this way: if Wrestler A and Wrestler B are the only two people in the ring, they’re won’t hold fire because they know a common enemy is waiting for their name to be called, they’ll both be thinking of a title opportunity the guy on the other side of the ring is standing in the way of. Or you can look at the bigger picture: while on paper it’s three vs a couple of dozen, and from that standpoint you’d think it would be a walkover, those couple of dozen are all taking their own baggage into the match with them, baggage that will throw common sense out of the window if a couple of entrants have some unfinished business – meaning that’s two people Carmine and company won’t have to worry about, and that will give them all the time in the world to find the quickest and most effective way to bundle them out of the match.
Exhaling deeply, Karma leans back before he continues
I know this sounds negative, defeatist even, but let me make it clear that I’m not: what I am saying is that if anyone, not just me, wants to improve their odds of coming out of the Gold Rush Rumble with a win they need to make sure The New Kings can’t dictate the match they want, which will get them the result they want. So I’m not going to assume victory – or, as Cannon would say, tell you a story – if I don’t establish that this story has a villain at the heart of it, and that villain needs to be stopped. And I don’t mean a villain like in Batman Returns, with a plan that makes zero sense and is easily thwarted in the most anticlimactic fashion, I’m talking more batman Begins where the villain has a plan, knows how to execute it, and they’ll be showing up after the ending credits no matter how defeated they look on the night. At the very least, I hope somebody listens to me so they don’t walk out on the ramp, see the three of them in the ring, but think “What the heck” and rush the ring anyway – because that would be more kalye than shelling out for an extended warranty.
Rather than finish right there, Karma leans back a little further and stretches
More than anything else, though, I know that The New Kings have a chink in their armour, and that chink is the fact they are assuming superiority rather than taking it. It happened with their loss to Reid, Storm and Darling a few weeks ago, just as it happened when Carmine’s quest to regain the Pride Championship was doomed to fail so badly that Cannon and Diamond had to hit the ring and save him a second straight loss to yours truly – and if Carmine wants to claim anything else, he’s the one telling stories.
Resistance is the key to removing the threat they pose in the match, and that is key to victory. I’ve shown plenty of times that I am not somebody who is just going to roll over and let whoever wants to talk a big game get the victory they believe is their right, and this must be eating away at Carmine and Cannon because they are the two people who should know this better than anyone else. Because while victory is the thing I crave most in this year’s Rumble, making sure the three of them fail to bully their way to glory comes pretty damn close.
Normally this would be the moment where Karma hands things back to Cherry to wrap up the show, but today is not a normal edition of Karmic TV…
14th April 2016, Coney Island, NYC
We see Karma sat on a bench looking out over the Atlantic ocean that is spread out before him, shielding his eyes from the spring sun that may be enough to make him need to squint but isn’t enough to have him consider taking off the Mets track jacket that is protecting him from the chillier elements in the air, and he’s wondering where the heck Cherry’s got to because she should’ve been here ten minutes ago - which is especially strange as this is her neck of the woods after all
Felling as though he’s either waiting in the wrong place or, more worryingly, something’s wrong Karma pulls out his phone and starts to poke out a message – although compared to Cherry’s quite remarkable HTC-fu, Karma’s attempts at writing a quick text mainly involves him tutting as yet another typo appears on his screen. However, Karma endures and he eventually manages to write the message he intended to write, and in doing so there is a small part of him that is relieved that Cherry didn’t arrive before he’d finished writing it out…again
After sending his text out into the ether, Karma goes back to looking out over the ocean as he awaits a reply, and he finds the sound of the waves crashing against the shore to be relaxing – no matter how much the seagulls try and disrupt his little moment of calm with their incessant chatter. But as Karma sits in his little bubble of relaxation, he hears another sound: it’s faint at first, but it seems to be getting louder, as if it’s…coming closer. It sounds a lot like somebody is banging a couple of objects together in a rhythmic manner, and once the sound starts to get much clearer…
J-K, come out to play-i-ay!
At which point Karma turns around to look behind him, and he sees Cherry has snuck up behind him and on one of her hands she has a glass bottle attached to every other finger, which she has been banging together
Couldn’t resist!
Cherry bats her eyelashes at Karma, giving a kittenish smile as she expends more effort than she expected in trying to get the bottles off of her fingers
You’d be amazed how hard it is to find glass bottles these days, and it’s not like I’m going to root around in the first recycling bin I could find.
Wait a second, you’re telling me you’re late because…you were looking for empty beer bottles?
Well it’s not like I was going to empty three of them on my own. I’m a lady, thank you very much!
Cherry strikes a pose of mock indignation at the thought of chugging that much beer in that little time…hoping that Karma doesn’t feel the need to mention her superhuman ability to demolish shots of Sambuca as if they were water
So what’s on your mind J-K?
I was thinking about what you said, about getting some regular backup to make sure Carmine et al won’t be getting the jump on me every time I so much as sneeze. And then I got thinking about this one time a group of guys found themselves in a bad situation, miles away from home and facing overwhelming odds. I’m pretty sure you know the story I’m talking about…
Karma gestures towards the bottles Cherry has just about managed to remove from her fingers
Anyway, what I’m trying to say is that if what I said the other day on Karmic TV doesn’t hit home, not only am I going to be so utterly pist avek that I couldn’t get a few people to listen to some common sense and make the FWA roster pay a higher price than they can possibly imagine, but things will just get worse and worse until half the roster get sick and tired of the three-on-one beatdowns and go somewhere else, and if we get to a situation where people would rather quit than fight back then I have to wonder why I bothered trying to make FWA a better place.
So what’re you thinking?
Karma looks past Cherry towards the Wonder Wheel that stands at the heart of Luna Park
I think maybe I should look for some people who want to fight.
To be continued...
