Post by ketamine on Mar 3, 2016 20:47:48 GMT -5
She’d been nervous about the whole thing, chewing her bottom lip during the drive to the restaurant. When she’d agreed to it everything had been a little less complicated. But now… now she was hooking up with her ex-boyfriend. Once could have been a mistake, a lapse in judgement but twice… twice, she was pretty sure, counted as officially hooking up. Even though every shred of sanity still left inside of her screamed that he was only going to hurt her again, her heart was an idiot.
She’d forgotten all about the thing she’d agreed to do until her mother had brought it up when she’d picked up the babies last week after an exhausting training session. And there was no way to get out of it, either, not unless she wanted to admit things that no one would understand.
Months ago, she’d agreed to go to dinner with her mother’s best friend’s son. He was going to be in New Orleans for an internship and he didn’t know anyone. She wasn’t stupid enough to believe that it was a coincidence that her mother had instantly volunteered her. They were the same age and her mother had used words like solid and dependable and stable to describe him. He was the exact opposite of the man who had, in her mother’s eyes, recklessly gotten her pregnant when she was barely legal and then left her at home alone with two toddlers while he traveled the world to fight for a living.
Trying to explain that she wasn’t looking for anything right now was useless. Right now, her career was the most important thing to her, right below the two four year olds who called her mama and maybe figuring out whatever it was that was going on between her and their father.
Though, maybe nothing after tonight. He hadn’t said anything when he’d come over to put the twins to bed and stay with them while she was gone. He’d said nothing but his jaw had tightened when she’d reluctantly revealed where she was going.
Now, she was sitting awkwardly across from her “blind date” at a decent enough restaurant downtime. Her mother had tried to argue that it wasn’t a blind date because they “knew each other” but had conveniently forgotten that the last time she’d been in the same room with Remington they’d been three.
“I’m sorry about all this,” he’d said, in the kind of Creole tang that she’d grown up with and had the side effect of instantly putting her at ease. “My mom…” he shrugged. He looked just like her mother had described him and maybe under normal circumstances she would have drooled a little when he’d met her in the front lobby.
He was tall, which she liked… he had flawless skin the color of coffee diluted down with heavy cream and hazel eyes ringed by the thickest black eyelashes she’d ever seen on a boy. In short, he looked like he’d just stepped off of the cover of GQ and she looked…
It wasn’t easy getting ready for something when she had not one but two kids whining about bedtime and begging for stories and juice and pulling on her clothes and climbing up into her lap to smear off her lipstick. Topping it all off with barely getting any sleep the night before because Gracie had woken up from a bad dream and her crying had woken up her brother and next thing Nero had known she’d had two squirming toddlers in her bed.
“It’s fine,” she said, conjuring a smile as she chewed at the straw in her sweet tea. “My mom’s kinda the same way. I mean, not that I’m not enjoying myself.” Mentally, she chastised herself for being rude even though her mind was in a million other places and none of them were at the table, making polite small talk with a virtual stranger.
A virtual stranger who was potentially the hottest man she’d ever laid eyes on.
“Anyway, uhh…” she wracked her mind for something to talk about but her whole world consisted of two babies he most likely wouldn’t be interested in. Which made her want to kick herself or maybe her mother for setting this whole thing up. What guy her age would want to date a girl with two kids who came before him? Who had to be home for bedtimes and tea parties and couldn’t go out and party every night?
No one wanted the responsibility that she came along with and she’d (tried) to content herself with being alone for a good long while. Maybe forever.
“So… what’s your internship about, Remington?”
There. That was something safe that wasn’t small child related.
“Sports medicine,” he said, with a shrug, “Those who can’t do… uh, I guess rub down those who can? Though that sounds kind of like another occupation, doesn’t it?” He flashed her a dimpled smile, “And please stop with that Remington stuff. I feel like I should look behind me for some old white dude.”
That brought a laugh to her lips as she nearly choked on her sweet tea.
“All my friends call me Remy.”
The laugh bubbles over into a snort that she tries to hide by coughing instead. “Like Gambit?” She immediately worried that that reference was too geeky, a flush rising to her cheeks.
“Yeah, but you put a deck of cards in my hands and you’ll end up playing 52 card pick up. I really am sorry you got dragged out here… I’m sure you probably have your hands full with two kids.”
So her mother had told him about the babies. She’d been a little worried, for a moment, that she’d have to sit and squirm through his uncomfortable realization that she was someone’s mother which had happened on more than one of the uncomfortable Tinder dates she’d dragged herself out on before giving up entirely.
Nero rolled her eyes, “Between them and training, I’m pretty sure that my mother thinks I’ll never ‘find someone’.” She wasn’t entirely sure why she said it, but Remy was someone who was easy to talk to and the words had just slid out.
“Story of my life,” he said, stirring his straw in his tea. At least they had that in common, though it was rare to find someone below the Mason-Dixon line who didn’t like sweet tea. “But I just don’t have the heart to tell her why I don’t bring home girls for her to fawn all over.”
The comment struck her as odd and she tilted her head, arching an eyebrow and inviting him to continue.
He hesitated. “I’m gay… but I haven’t got the balls to tell my own mom. Like, really gay. Super gay.”
There was a silence so absolute you could hear a pin drop and then she couldn’t help the laughter that bubbled up out of her. “Oh, thank god.”
Now it was Remy’s turn to look at her in confusion, the outburst not exactly what he’d been expecting. He wasn’t sure what he’d been expecting but it hadn’t seemed fair to sit across from the sweet, blue haired girl and lead her on with false expectations for their evening together. Even if it meant she got angry and stormed out and the news reached his mother through the great Southern-Small-Town-Grapevine and not in a way he would have preferred.
Laughter hadn’t even crossed his mind as a potential reaction.
“I’m sorry,” Nero gasped, finally managing to catch her breath and stifle her giggles. “I just… this is perfect. I’m not… really looking for anything. Things are complicated enough right now but my mom… I was worried you’d think…”
The giggles were back but this time Remy joined in them. When the laughter finally dies down, Nero flashes him a more easy going grin.
“I don’t really have time for dates and all that stuff… I’m more focused on my career at this point but my mom doesn’t really understand all that. I know she just wants me to be happy but…”
“But you are happy, doing what you love,” he finished for her.
Nero scrunched her nose, “I am… even though things aren’t going so great for me right now. I guess that’s kind of par for the course. I mean, I came out of KWI on this high and refused to acknowledge that maybe it was beginners luck or something like that. Now…”
Her full lips twist into a frown. Her first two matches in FGA hadn’t been in her favor. She’d done her best but her best hadn’t been good enough and she couldn’t help but fall back to Brandon Banks’ words when she’d mentioned going home to HKW. He’d suggested developmentals for her instead and she’d taken it as an insult. She was ready to fly, she’d thought.. ready for the big stage… now she was wondering how much of that had been ego. What if she wasn’t really ready to fly and now…
She tried to push it out of her head and let herself have a nice night with a new friend but the doubts and the worries kept creeping back up on her. Maybe she’d only convinced herself she could do this… but how long before they fired her or worse… she became some sort of joke.
She already felt a little bit like a joke.
“I follow you in FGA, you know?” he said over dessert. “Well, I mean, I followed FGA before you showed up but I remember seeing you in HKW when you were the… what were you?”
She laughed. “Officially I was Brandon Banks’ assistant. I think I might still be. All I know is he keeps paying me.”
She dug into her vegan brownie sundae to quell her unhappiness. “I guess you saw the last two shows then.”
Rent leaned over and snatched up a scoop of her almond milk ice cream. “I did but… don't give yourself such a hard time, Nero. I'm gonna be watching this week and I bet you're gonna do great.”
She’d forgotten all about the thing she’d agreed to do until her mother had brought it up when she’d picked up the babies last week after an exhausting training session. And there was no way to get out of it, either, not unless she wanted to admit things that no one would understand.
Months ago, she’d agreed to go to dinner with her mother’s best friend’s son. He was going to be in New Orleans for an internship and he didn’t know anyone. She wasn’t stupid enough to believe that it was a coincidence that her mother had instantly volunteered her. They were the same age and her mother had used words like solid and dependable and stable to describe him. He was the exact opposite of the man who had, in her mother’s eyes, recklessly gotten her pregnant when she was barely legal and then left her at home alone with two toddlers while he traveled the world to fight for a living.
Trying to explain that she wasn’t looking for anything right now was useless. Right now, her career was the most important thing to her, right below the two four year olds who called her mama and maybe figuring out whatever it was that was going on between her and their father.
Though, maybe nothing after tonight. He hadn’t said anything when he’d come over to put the twins to bed and stay with them while she was gone. He’d said nothing but his jaw had tightened when she’d reluctantly revealed where she was going.
Now, she was sitting awkwardly across from her “blind date” at a decent enough restaurant downtime. Her mother had tried to argue that it wasn’t a blind date because they “knew each other” but had conveniently forgotten that the last time she’d been in the same room with Remington they’d been three.
“I’m sorry about all this,” he’d said, in the kind of Creole tang that she’d grown up with and had the side effect of instantly putting her at ease. “My mom…” he shrugged. He looked just like her mother had described him and maybe under normal circumstances she would have drooled a little when he’d met her in the front lobby.
He was tall, which she liked… he had flawless skin the color of coffee diluted down with heavy cream and hazel eyes ringed by the thickest black eyelashes she’d ever seen on a boy. In short, he looked like he’d just stepped off of the cover of GQ and she looked…
It wasn’t easy getting ready for something when she had not one but two kids whining about bedtime and begging for stories and juice and pulling on her clothes and climbing up into her lap to smear off her lipstick. Topping it all off with barely getting any sleep the night before because Gracie had woken up from a bad dream and her crying had woken up her brother and next thing Nero had known she’d had two squirming toddlers in her bed.
“It’s fine,” she said, conjuring a smile as she chewed at the straw in her sweet tea. “My mom’s kinda the same way. I mean, not that I’m not enjoying myself.” Mentally, she chastised herself for being rude even though her mind was in a million other places and none of them were at the table, making polite small talk with a virtual stranger.
A virtual stranger who was potentially the hottest man she’d ever laid eyes on.
“Anyway, uhh…” she wracked her mind for something to talk about but her whole world consisted of two babies he most likely wouldn’t be interested in. Which made her want to kick herself or maybe her mother for setting this whole thing up. What guy her age would want to date a girl with two kids who came before him? Who had to be home for bedtimes and tea parties and couldn’t go out and party every night?
No one wanted the responsibility that she came along with and she’d (tried) to content herself with being alone for a good long while. Maybe forever.
“So… what’s your internship about, Remington?”
There. That was something safe that wasn’t small child related.
“Sports medicine,” he said, with a shrug, “Those who can’t do… uh, I guess rub down those who can? Though that sounds kind of like another occupation, doesn’t it?” He flashed her a dimpled smile, “And please stop with that Remington stuff. I feel like I should look behind me for some old white dude.”
That brought a laugh to her lips as she nearly choked on her sweet tea.
“All my friends call me Remy.”
The laugh bubbles over into a snort that she tries to hide by coughing instead. “Like Gambit?” She immediately worried that that reference was too geeky, a flush rising to her cheeks.
“Yeah, but you put a deck of cards in my hands and you’ll end up playing 52 card pick up. I really am sorry you got dragged out here… I’m sure you probably have your hands full with two kids.”
So her mother had told him about the babies. She’d been a little worried, for a moment, that she’d have to sit and squirm through his uncomfortable realization that she was someone’s mother which had happened on more than one of the uncomfortable Tinder dates she’d dragged herself out on before giving up entirely.
Nero rolled her eyes, “Between them and training, I’m pretty sure that my mother thinks I’ll never ‘find someone’.” She wasn’t entirely sure why she said it, but Remy was someone who was easy to talk to and the words had just slid out.
“Story of my life,” he said, stirring his straw in his tea. At least they had that in common, though it was rare to find someone below the Mason-Dixon line who didn’t like sweet tea. “But I just don’t have the heart to tell her why I don’t bring home girls for her to fawn all over.”
The comment struck her as odd and she tilted her head, arching an eyebrow and inviting him to continue.
He hesitated. “I’m gay… but I haven’t got the balls to tell my own mom. Like, really gay. Super gay.”
There was a silence so absolute you could hear a pin drop and then she couldn’t help the laughter that bubbled up out of her. “Oh, thank god.”
Now it was Remy’s turn to look at her in confusion, the outburst not exactly what he’d been expecting. He wasn’t sure what he’d been expecting but it hadn’t seemed fair to sit across from the sweet, blue haired girl and lead her on with false expectations for their evening together. Even if it meant she got angry and stormed out and the news reached his mother through the great Southern-Small-Town-Grapevine and not in a way he would have preferred.
Laughter hadn’t even crossed his mind as a potential reaction.
“I’m sorry,” Nero gasped, finally managing to catch her breath and stifle her giggles. “I just… this is perfect. I’m not… really looking for anything. Things are complicated enough right now but my mom… I was worried you’d think…”
The giggles were back but this time Remy joined in them. When the laughter finally dies down, Nero flashes him a more easy going grin.
“I don’t really have time for dates and all that stuff… I’m more focused on my career at this point but my mom doesn’t really understand all that. I know she just wants me to be happy but…”
“But you are happy, doing what you love,” he finished for her.
Nero scrunched her nose, “I am… even though things aren’t going so great for me right now. I guess that’s kind of par for the course. I mean, I came out of KWI on this high and refused to acknowledge that maybe it was beginners luck or something like that. Now…”
Her full lips twist into a frown. Her first two matches in FGA hadn’t been in her favor. She’d done her best but her best hadn’t been good enough and she couldn’t help but fall back to Brandon Banks’ words when she’d mentioned going home to HKW. He’d suggested developmentals for her instead and she’d taken it as an insult. She was ready to fly, she’d thought.. ready for the big stage… now she was wondering how much of that had been ego. What if she wasn’t really ready to fly and now…
She tried to push it out of her head and let herself have a nice night with a new friend but the doubts and the worries kept creeping back up on her. Maybe she’d only convinced herself she could do this… but how long before they fired her or worse… she became some sort of joke.
She already felt a little bit like a joke.
“I follow you in FGA, you know?” he said over dessert. “Well, I mean, I followed FGA before you showed up but I remember seeing you in HKW when you were the… what were you?”
She laughed. “Officially I was Brandon Banks’ assistant. I think I might still be. All I know is he keeps paying me.”
She dug into her vegan brownie sundae to quell her unhappiness. “I guess you saw the last two shows then.”
Rent leaned over and snatched up a scoop of her almond milk ice cream. “I did but… don't give yourself such a hard time, Nero. I'm gonna be watching this week and I bet you're gonna do great.”