Three Little Piggies [word count - 797]
Sept 14, 2015 10:01:11 GMT -5
Post by styg on Sept 14, 2015 10:01:11 GMT -5
"I remember when I was like Valcone," begins Serenity, "I remember the fear and confusion I felt when I was in his shoes."
She and Ligaya are standing side by side in front of the red brick walls of Battlegrounds Academy.
"I remember how I felt," she continues, "When I discovered how ugly the world is. Valcone is a man whose eyes are opening, coming to see the futility, the emptiness of life. And call me a recidivistic optimist but I'd like to believe he's not faking it like Brody Watts was. Now, Valcone's hectic as fuck with it, wearyingly so, but I guess it makes sense; he's obviously still in the 'anger' stage. He'll calm down in time. I mean, I did. Listen Valcone, I get it. I've been there. Come see me once you get to depression and I can help you with the transition into acceptance."
She raises an eyebrow. "But, uh, I'ma avoid you while you're in bargaining, 'kay? I remember when I was there, and holy fuck, was I annoying to my friends. So clingy." She shudders as she remembers it.
With a guilty expression, Ligaya admits, "You were a bit. Although... does Valcone even have friends? Like, considering the way he dumped Laura after he got what he wanted from her... So he prolly won't have that problem," she concludes, without irony or sarcasm.
"Oh yeah," nods Serenity, "I'd tell Song and Baroness to watch their backs... if I actually gave a fuck about either of them, that is. Shit, I ain't gonna be surprised if they spend mosta this match just backstabbing each other."
"The Three Stooges with chainsaws," giggles Ligaya.
"Haha, right?"
Ligaya clears her throat. "Speaking of Hana Song, though... you said you remember being like Valcone... well, I remember when I was like Hana."
With a put-on frown, Serenity asks, "Huh? I don't remember you ever looking like a Taiwanese ladyboy..."
"No, no," continues Ligaya, either no-selling Serenity's possibly racist and transphobic remark or oblivious to it, "I mean thinking I was the freshest hot shit because I had one or two sorta big-ish wins."
"Oh. Yeah. To be fair," responds Serenity, "You never went full embarrassment with it like she is with her desperate little God of Anger cosplay shit, like the thirteenth-rate clone of Artemis Kaiser she is."
"Oh?" says Ligaya, her brow furrowing, "I thought she was doing Gwen Massey..."
"Nah, I think that's more Crimson Baroness's shit. She's about as obsessed with Katie Kensington as Massey is with Lacey Cohen, for a start..."
"I know right? Like, damn, just fuck her and get it out your system."
Serenity laughs along with Ligaya, a nastier edge to hers than The Blazin' Blasian's, then shakes her head as she tries to refocus on the promo. "Anyway, you were different with it, but I do remember you getting all overconfident. So I get what you mean about Song. Hana, maybe before you walk around acting like the greatest wrestler who ever lived, you need to actually do some noteworthy shit to make anyone believe it. Or do you just want to be the next AKIRA Kaede that badly? Baroness, credit where it's due, she has that Carolinas Cup thing. That's something. It's only one thing, but it's one more thing than Hana's got going for her."
"Y'know... I don't think either of us has ever been like The Crimson Baroness?" observes Ligaya, clearly thinking hard about it.
"No, neither of us've ever been that goddamn irritating. Neither of us has ever wanted to be Rachel McAdams in Mean Girls while thinking we were Winona Ryder in Beetlejuice. But TCB can play the misunderstood outcast all she wants; she's still the same kind of petty, bullying, status-obssessed loser as Hana and so many others."
Ligaya seems to be getting slightly perturbed by Serenity's mounting vitriol, but shakes it off as she says, "There's one more person in this: Terrence Tillman. And honestly? I'm looking forward to teaming with you, Triple T."
"Same. Congratulations on the win in our match at 2nd Impact," adds Serenity, "You earned it. I know that damn well, because I was there. I know everyone's got their eyes on you right now, but hey, if people like Song and Kaede hate you that much, you gotta be doing something right."
"And unlike Valcone or Hana or TCB, you won't have to worry about your partners turning on you this Wednesday. Everyone wants to be where you are, but the way for us to do that is to pick up a big win with you. Too much respect to turn on you... something our opponents this week won't understand."
With a wink promising violence, Serenity adds, "But maybe we'll teach them a little."
Fade.
She and Ligaya are standing side by side in front of the red brick walls of Battlegrounds Academy.
"I remember how I felt," she continues, "When I discovered how ugly the world is. Valcone is a man whose eyes are opening, coming to see the futility, the emptiness of life. And call me a recidivistic optimist but I'd like to believe he's not faking it like Brody Watts was. Now, Valcone's hectic as fuck with it, wearyingly so, but I guess it makes sense; he's obviously still in the 'anger' stage. He'll calm down in time. I mean, I did. Listen Valcone, I get it. I've been there. Come see me once you get to depression and I can help you with the transition into acceptance."
She raises an eyebrow. "But, uh, I'ma avoid you while you're in bargaining, 'kay? I remember when I was there, and holy fuck, was I annoying to my friends. So clingy." She shudders as she remembers it.
With a guilty expression, Ligaya admits, "You were a bit. Although... does Valcone even have friends? Like, considering the way he dumped Laura after he got what he wanted from her... So he prolly won't have that problem," she concludes, without irony or sarcasm.
"Oh yeah," nods Serenity, "I'd tell Song and Baroness to watch their backs... if I actually gave a fuck about either of them, that is. Shit, I ain't gonna be surprised if they spend mosta this match just backstabbing each other."
"The Three Stooges with chainsaws," giggles Ligaya.
"Haha, right?"
Ligaya clears her throat. "Speaking of Hana Song, though... you said you remember being like Valcone... well, I remember when I was like Hana."
With a put-on frown, Serenity asks, "Huh? I don't remember you ever looking like a Taiwanese ladyboy..."
"No, no," continues Ligaya, either no-selling Serenity's possibly racist and transphobic remark or oblivious to it, "I mean thinking I was the freshest hot shit because I had one or two sorta big-ish wins."
"Oh. Yeah. To be fair," responds Serenity, "You never went full embarrassment with it like she is with her desperate little God of Anger cosplay shit, like the thirteenth-rate clone of Artemis Kaiser she is."
"Oh?" says Ligaya, her brow furrowing, "I thought she was doing Gwen Massey..."
"Nah, I think that's more Crimson Baroness's shit. She's about as obsessed with Katie Kensington as Massey is with Lacey Cohen, for a start..."
"I know right? Like, damn, just fuck her and get it out your system."
Serenity laughs along with Ligaya, a nastier edge to hers than The Blazin' Blasian's, then shakes her head as she tries to refocus on the promo. "Anyway, you were different with it, but I do remember you getting all overconfident. So I get what you mean about Song. Hana, maybe before you walk around acting like the greatest wrestler who ever lived, you need to actually do some noteworthy shit to make anyone believe it. Or do you just want to be the next AKIRA Kaede that badly? Baroness, credit where it's due, she has that Carolinas Cup thing. That's something. It's only one thing, but it's one more thing than Hana's got going for her."
"Y'know... I don't think either of us has ever been like The Crimson Baroness?" observes Ligaya, clearly thinking hard about it.
"No, neither of us've ever been that goddamn irritating. Neither of us has ever wanted to be Rachel McAdams in Mean Girls while thinking we were Winona Ryder in Beetlejuice. But TCB can play the misunderstood outcast all she wants; she's still the same kind of petty, bullying, status-obssessed loser as Hana and so many others."
Ligaya seems to be getting slightly perturbed by Serenity's mounting vitriol, but shakes it off as she says, "There's one more person in this: Terrence Tillman. And honestly? I'm looking forward to teaming with you, Triple T."
"Same. Congratulations on the win in our match at 2nd Impact," adds Serenity, "You earned it. I know that damn well, because I was there. I know everyone's got their eyes on you right now, but hey, if people like Song and Kaede hate you that much, you gotta be doing something right."
"And unlike Valcone or Hana or TCB, you won't have to worry about your partners turning on you this Wednesday. Everyone wants to be where you are, but the way for us to do that is to pick up a big win with you. Too much respect to turn on you... something our opponents this week won't understand."
With a wink promising violence, Serenity adds, "But maybe we'll teach them a little."
Fade.