[BLOG] Tony Shouts Things! S2/E1 "Tony STILL Shouts Things!"

[Dave]

"You know what to do, Tony. You've done it once. Just sit there and write what's on your heart."
"I think it's murmur. I should see a doctor, 'cause it's definitely heart murmur."

So, yeah, that's how the talk between me and my wife went when I told her I should write a blog again.

I mean, that's how it went until she walked away angrily and slammed the damn door, right after my last sentence.

Nonetheless, I still think it's murmur.

I think I should introduce myself. My name is Tony Allen, and if you've watched the inaugural episode of Lion's Den Fighting Championship's show Pride, you've seen me in the ring, holding a mic, shouting weights, names and hometowns out loud. Yup, that's what I've been paid for to do since 1999 or so. Livin' the life. Also, if the ex-KWI: Coalition people have been spreading rumors, I would like to officially deny that I am Kevin James. Come on. I'm totally much more like, I dunno, early 2000s Pierce Brosnan.

I haven't done this since last Summer. Up until the day after the first episode of Pride, my last Tweet was from last July, goddamnit. But now I'm back behind the mic, and my voice should be heard. And the random shit I write should be read.

You know, arriving to the Lion's Den locker room made me go back to the good old days when I began in LAWA. Early 2000s, when Dave Parker used to run the thing, everyone under 230 pounds was a punk-ass jobber and everyone who had a flippy move in their moveset was trying too hard. I mean, have you seen the size of those guys?! Half of the roster is, like, 280 pounds and more! And that's not chicken nuggets and Cheeseburgers, son, that's MUSCLE!

However, I was very pleasantly surprised when I saw those guys perform in the ring. You know, the difference is that the big guys Dave was letting into LAWA back then were fucktards that were eating steroids in bagels made of... eh... something... illegal. You get my point. These guys here in LDFC can actually rassle! So if you just think that this is a small promotion full of big guys with five moves and less, you're being as ignorant as I was at the beginning. This show is gonna kick some serious ass all around North Carolina and you're gonna love it. You know it.

Thanks for letting me join the ride.

Your loudly shouting,
Tony Allen