Crowe's Feedback

[Mandrew]

I'm not going to make a habit of asking for feedback but given that this is the first RP I've written for about two years (aside from one one-off RP in November 2011, LOL) I thought I'd go ahead and take the hits.

For the record also, if I've got a CD element that I believe will affect my RPs I will tag it on either before or after like I did with this posting. Of course, if it's a stand alone piece I'll post it in the CD thread but in the case of my first Crowe RP I thought it might help "set the scene" a little more.

So yea, knock yourself out. Pros, cons, adivce, right now I'll take it because I know I'm nowhere near at the top of my game and until I've developed more of a rapport with everyone's characters (let alone my own) I don't think I will ever be there.

"A Name To Make - Or Redeem..."

[Stephen]

I've been meaning to get to this.

If you're not at the top of your game already then we as readers are in for a helluva a treat whenever you are. Your storytelling skills have always been top notch imo, and this was no different. You paint a scene very nicely with very little in the first scene. As a reader, I was hoping for more. As an efedder, probably best to keep that part short and sweet.

The main rp was superb. You gave as an overview of who Crowe is, and what his plans are... Or aren't rather lol. You paint him as an optimistic pessimist when you talked about all previous accomplishments meaning nothing, yet something and also by displaying Crowe's optimism about the future with the clay comparison. The match talk was good considering everyone other than Rain is debuting. Smart idea to put a focus on her.

Overall, I loved this roleplay. Knowing your previous work, I'm excited to see what Crowe develops into.

[Mandrew]

Thanks for the kind words, mate. I was hoping SOMEONE would swing by to say something (positive OR negative) about my debut RP so for you to rub my ego like that means a lot

Anyway, here's my second RP for this week's show. Again, I'm not feeling all that great about it, but then I had most of it written by like Monday/Tuesday and with nothing to bounce off I struggled. Thankfully managed to shoehorn in a little this morning after getting something to play with from a couple of my opponents. That's not a dig at anyone, for the record. I just found it difficult trying not to walk the same road as my first RP when none of our characters have any history and there was nothing to to bounce off. All I know is it'll get easier the longer time goes on!

The Perfect Combination

Again, any thoughts welcome.


Don't all rush in at once, yea?