The RubyWay Chronicles - Part 10: Nightmares & Dreamscapes
Sept 1, 2016 15:38:51 GMT -5
Post by Kevin Hardaway on Sept 1, 2016 15:38:51 GMT -5
Welcome to a pain that I know all too well about.
A pain of being so close, yet so far. A pain of reaching out your fingertips. A pain of seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. And then having it all be taken away in a moment’s notice. You don’t even blink. You don’t even breathe correctly. Because in an instant, it’s all taken away from you and now you just sit here and wallow in your own self-pity like an asshole while everybody laughs at you and everybody threatens you like the pieces of shit they are. Because that’s what it always is. That’s always been my life since day one. My brain works a little differently than others so excuse me for running off the deep end one too many times, because this has happened before. But it’s no excuse, it should be no excuse.
But fuck it if I’ll try to anyways, because everybody’s always looking for that one little crack in the shell. They see that crack and it’s IMPERFECTION! MARTYR! It’s almost like you have to be perfect in order to succeed, especially in today’s world. And you know what, that’s what I feel like today. I feel imperfect because of a stupid mistake and of course, everybody points at me like they’re a pod person of some sort. It’s just funny. We have to be perfect to succeed, yet one look at the field for the FGA World Championship and it’s anything but. Maybe I should beat up a girl, take drugs, that’ll for sure get me to the top. Nope. No hard work is necessary here. Just being a good ol’ fashioned fuck-up will do the trick. Lord knows it worked before for me. Ever been compared to Adolf Hitler? BECAUSE I HAVE!
But that’s not the time or place. My partner-in-crime has done enough of that for the both of us, but you know what...I agree with her 110% on everything. Yet, here we are...without titles...without the grace to say that we’re the best tag team on the planet...without anything, because of a blink of an eye too late to see somebody coming down from the skies on me. My problem though is quite so simple. Cordy should have finished the job on me, not take the easy road out. You and Dan want to make your claim as the champions, then you should have pulled the trigger on my head instead of double-tapping Ricky to make sure he was still down. But no, you took the chickenshit way out, and for what? To get blindsided by a bunch of goons and a guy whose sole claim is to make sure you have to take two showers at a time.
Yeah, have fun with that. Me and Ruby will be busy here trying to climb the ladder to get to the top once again.
Well, look at that. We’ve already made it back to the top. How convenient.
But no. Instead, me and Ruby have to go at it solo this week. Because for some reason, instead of putting us back in the title hunt, we have to do things on our own. And oh my fucking god, did they pick the worst week in sending out a new kid off the bus to his first day of work. It seems to be the norm for me, don’t you think? I always get the fresh meat. And you know what, it always ends up the same. Kid comes off the bus, looking as happy and jubilant as ever, he’s getting ready to make his national television debut in front of friends and family anddddddd it’s gone. One of the golden rules I have for my matches is that I never bring my friends or my family here, because every single time that I have done that, with the exception of one time, it’s ended in nothing but tragedy. Because across the ring from him is somebody who’s not in a happy mood right now. Somebody who will show the new kid that this business isn’t unicorns and rainbows, that it’s colder than an Alaskan winter. And from the looks of him...he hasn’t gotten long in this world. Especially against me.
And here I am, having to tell this kid what he’s getting himself into, telling him about all of the blood that I have spilled, the scars on my body, almost losing my life countless times, you name it, it’s happened. But you know what...this time I’m not. This time, I’m not sacrificing myself and I’m not wasting MY time trying to tell this kid and his family what on God’s green earth did they sign when he agreed to a contract here. They should know. They should understand. To him, it’s the opportunity of a lifetime. To me, it’s just another day in my life. Nothing else, nothing more. And quite honestly, this just seems like a dog playing with a new chew toy. It’s so bad that I won’t even call this kid by his actual name.
That’s how worthless he is.
I’m fucking better than this, and so is Ruby. Time after time after time after time, it’s just been the same old routine for everybody towards us. And it’s finally time to say that enough is enough.
You’ll see what I mean soon. We promise.
====================================================================
It’s weird to think about anything else when all on the mind is that hotel room in Anaheim. Her busting through that door and pretty much taking him has not left his psyche since it happened. And every few seconds, even when he’s trying to think about something else, or trying to do something with either his daughter or by himself, the sight of her eyes smiling at him, giving in to all of her desires that have been building up inside not just her, but him as well, everything about her just couldn’t leave his mind. He knew things were going to be awkward, but things were better than the both of them could ever expect. Sure, there was the constant bickering going on, but it almost felt like they had to save face towards themselves and everybody else. The second they find out what’s been going on, everybody will have a field day.
It’s calmed the nerves though, even after their crushing defeat at Above and Beyond V. That’s when everything went back to normal. She went back to her studies and he went back to his training. A hushed silence was usually in the air. He didn’t scream at her TV as much, but still stuck around once in awhile to watch something. He knew...he still had paper balls thrown at his direction. But to the unseen eye, she was having a good time throwing them. Unlike the previous few times where she was throwing them out of anger. Of course, he couldn’t know that. But it still pained her in a way to see him just throw them off like they were gnats or other scaly insects.
Maybe it was just the fact that the breeze in the air he felt as the two were walking to their locker room in Anaheim was just a weird coincidence. But something felt off. Like somebody was watching them. Or watching him. It didn’t really matter to him, and usually the thoughts of Ruby tracing all of the scars on his body and the two of them embraced as one kept running through his head. Maybe a nap would calm the nerves.
==========
But he hears a voice in a snowbank in a random park in Baltimore.
“Isn’t it wonderful?”
“Hmm?”
“Everything. The way it used to be.”
“This isn’t wonderful.”
“What? Why not?”
“Look at what you just said…”used to be”. You know what’s wonderful? My daughter. You know what’s wonderful? My friends and my family. You know what’s wonderful?”
“Ruby?”
“Just...get the fuck out of my head, Angie...okay? You think your little stunt at her house was funny? Because it wasn’t. You know how weird she looks at me now, knowing that she had to watch me shoot you in the chest with rock salt?”
“Come on, that was a love tap.”
“That was 4 years of pain and heartbreak and tragedy out of my body.”
“That was nothing. Listen, I can make things very easy for you or make you and your little cunt’s life a living hell, now what’s it going to be?”
He thought about swinging directly at her but held against it for obvious reasons...punching a ghost in a dream just screams therapy bills.
“I think I’m just going to wake up.”
“Okay, but I’m going to give you a taste of what’s to come. Hold on tight.”
She immediately puts her hands against his head, and even though he tries to pull away, a bunch of flashing images run through his head. One of absolute fire and crumbling buildings...one of blood and gore throughout the streets of Baltimore...one of the armies of the city trying to contain this insanity...one of Ruby holding a knife against her stomach, pale as a ghost, white as a sheet, near death, whispering the words to him…
“Till death do us part, remember?”
=========================
And with that he shoots up from his nightmare and shoots up from the sofa in a panicked sweat. Ruby immediately sees this from her library and rushes towards him, sitting down next to him, trying to console him, but then again...trying not to cause any more friction or problems between the two of them.
Ruby Tyler: You okay? What the fuck happened?
He doesn’t answer right away. Because the nice and happy thoughts of her looking peacefully at him have been replaced by the dreary and cataclysmic thoughts of her looking like she’s going to die right in front of him.
Ruby Tyler: Hey...answer me.
Kevin Hardaway: I...I think I just saw you die.
A pain of being so close, yet so far. A pain of reaching out your fingertips. A pain of seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. And then having it all be taken away in a moment’s notice. You don’t even blink. You don’t even breathe correctly. Because in an instant, it’s all taken away from you and now you just sit here and wallow in your own self-pity like an asshole while everybody laughs at you and everybody threatens you like the pieces of shit they are. Because that’s what it always is. That’s always been my life since day one. My brain works a little differently than others so excuse me for running off the deep end one too many times, because this has happened before. But it’s no excuse, it should be no excuse.
But fuck it if I’ll try to anyways, because everybody’s always looking for that one little crack in the shell. They see that crack and it’s IMPERFECTION! MARTYR! It’s almost like you have to be perfect in order to succeed, especially in today’s world. And you know what, that’s what I feel like today. I feel imperfect because of a stupid mistake and of course, everybody points at me like they’re a pod person of some sort. It’s just funny. We have to be perfect to succeed, yet one look at the field for the FGA World Championship and it’s anything but. Maybe I should beat up a girl, take drugs, that’ll for sure get me to the top. Nope. No hard work is necessary here. Just being a good ol’ fashioned fuck-up will do the trick. Lord knows it worked before for me. Ever been compared to Adolf Hitler? BECAUSE I HAVE!
But that’s not the time or place. My partner-in-crime has done enough of that for the both of us, but you know what...I agree with her 110% on everything. Yet, here we are...without titles...without the grace to say that we’re the best tag team on the planet...without anything, because of a blink of an eye too late to see somebody coming down from the skies on me. My problem though is quite so simple. Cordy should have finished the job on me, not take the easy road out. You and Dan want to make your claim as the champions, then you should have pulled the trigger on my head instead of double-tapping Ricky to make sure he was still down. But no, you took the chickenshit way out, and for what? To get blindsided by a bunch of goons and a guy whose sole claim is to make sure you have to take two showers at a time.
Yeah, have fun with that. Me and Ruby will be busy here trying to climb the ladder to get to the top once again.
Well, look at that. We’ve already made it back to the top. How convenient.
But no. Instead, me and Ruby have to go at it solo this week. Because for some reason, instead of putting us back in the title hunt, we have to do things on our own. And oh my fucking god, did they pick the worst week in sending out a new kid off the bus to his first day of work. It seems to be the norm for me, don’t you think? I always get the fresh meat. And you know what, it always ends up the same. Kid comes off the bus, looking as happy and jubilant as ever, he’s getting ready to make his national television debut in front of friends and family anddddddd it’s gone. One of the golden rules I have for my matches is that I never bring my friends or my family here, because every single time that I have done that, with the exception of one time, it’s ended in nothing but tragedy. Because across the ring from him is somebody who’s not in a happy mood right now. Somebody who will show the new kid that this business isn’t unicorns and rainbows, that it’s colder than an Alaskan winter. And from the looks of him...he hasn’t gotten long in this world. Especially against me.
And here I am, having to tell this kid what he’s getting himself into, telling him about all of the blood that I have spilled, the scars on my body, almost losing my life countless times, you name it, it’s happened. But you know what...this time I’m not. This time, I’m not sacrificing myself and I’m not wasting MY time trying to tell this kid and his family what on God’s green earth did they sign when he agreed to a contract here. They should know. They should understand. To him, it’s the opportunity of a lifetime. To me, it’s just another day in my life. Nothing else, nothing more. And quite honestly, this just seems like a dog playing with a new chew toy. It’s so bad that I won’t even call this kid by his actual name.
That’s how worthless he is.
I’m fucking better than this, and so is Ruby. Time after time after time after time, it’s just been the same old routine for everybody towards us. And it’s finally time to say that enough is enough.
You’ll see what I mean soon. We promise.
====================================================================
It’s weird to think about anything else when all on the mind is that hotel room in Anaheim. Her busting through that door and pretty much taking him has not left his psyche since it happened. And every few seconds, even when he’s trying to think about something else, or trying to do something with either his daughter or by himself, the sight of her eyes smiling at him, giving in to all of her desires that have been building up inside not just her, but him as well, everything about her just couldn’t leave his mind. He knew things were going to be awkward, but things were better than the both of them could ever expect. Sure, there was the constant bickering going on, but it almost felt like they had to save face towards themselves and everybody else. The second they find out what’s been going on, everybody will have a field day.
It’s calmed the nerves though, even after their crushing defeat at Above and Beyond V. That’s when everything went back to normal. She went back to her studies and he went back to his training. A hushed silence was usually in the air. He didn’t scream at her TV as much, but still stuck around once in awhile to watch something. He knew...he still had paper balls thrown at his direction. But to the unseen eye, she was having a good time throwing them. Unlike the previous few times where she was throwing them out of anger. Of course, he couldn’t know that. But it still pained her in a way to see him just throw them off like they were gnats or other scaly insects.
Maybe it was just the fact that the breeze in the air he felt as the two were walking to their locker room in Anaheim was just a weird coincidence. But something felt off. Like somebody was watching them. Or watching him. It didn’t really matter to him, and usually the thoughts of Ruby tracing all of the scars on his body and the two of them embraced as one kept running through his head. Maybe a nap would calm the nerves.
==========
But he hears a voice in a snowbank in a random park in Baltimore.
“Isn’t it wonderful?”
“Hmm?”
“Everything. The way it used to be.”
“This isn’t wonderful.”
“What? Why not?”
“Look at what you just said…”used to be”. You know what’s wonderful? My daughter. You know what’s wonderful? My friends and my family. You know what’s wonderful?”
“Ruby?”
“Just...get the fuck out of my head, Angie...okay? You think your little stunt at her house was funny? Because it wasn’t. You know how weird she looks at me now, knowing that she had to watch me shoot you in the chest with rock salt?”
“Come on, that was a love tap.”
“That was 4 years of pain and heartbreak and tragedy out of my body.”
“That was nothing. Listen, I can make things very easy for you or make you and your little cunt’s life a living hell, now what’s it going to be?”
He thought about swinging directly at her but held against it for obvious reasons...punching a ghost in a dream just screams therapy bills.
“I think I’m just going to wake up.”
“Okay, but I’m going to give you a taste of what’s to come. Hold on tight.”
She immediately puts her hands against his head, and even though he tries to pull away, a bunch of flashing images run through his head. One of absolute fire and crumbling buildings...one of blood and gore throughout the streets of Baltimore...one of the armies of the city trying to contain this insanity...one of Ruby holding a knife against her stomach, pale as a ghost, white as a sheet, near death, whispering the words to him…
“Till death do us part, remember?”
=========================
And with that he shoots up from his nightmare and shoots up from the sofa in a panicked sweat. Ruby immediately sees this from her library and rushes towards him, sitting down next to him, trying to console him, but then again...trying not to cause any more friction or problems between the two of them.
Ruby Tyler: You okay? What the fuck happened?
He doesn’t answer right away. Because the nice and happy thoughts of her looking peacefully at him have been replaced by the dreary and cataclysmic thoughts of her looking like she’s going to die right in front of him.
Ruby Tyler: Hey...answer me.
Kevin Hardaway: I...I think I just saw you die.
