STORM
Making Waves
Your Hero, And Mine.
Posts: 94 
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Post by STORM on Feb 4, 2016 18:22:54 GMT -5
I've posted a few things on the character development page, of past roleplays so people can further understand the character, and also was wondering what people thought of my most recent roleplays for Vertigo
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Feb 18, 2016 19:44:42 GMT -5
I'll get to this after your next match if that's ok
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STORM
Making Waves
Your Hero, And Mine.
Posts: 94
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Post by STORM on Mar 6, 2016 19:49:32 GMT -5
I'll get to this after your next match if that's ok Bit late of me asking, but yeah, whatcha think? xD |
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Post by FGA Office on Mar 10, 2016 20:26:52 GMT -5
I'll send some feedback your way tomorrow.
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STORM
Making Waves
Your Hero, And Mine.
Posts: 94
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Post by STORM on Mar 11, 2016 18:55:55 GMT -5
I'll send some feedback your way tomorrow. appreciated! |
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Mar 17, 2016 18:29:58 GMT -5
I haven't forgotten, I swear!
OK, lets start with a positive note: you've been scoring well so far on the character development part. We've all seen schizophrenic characters before and you're doing better than some I've seen, plus you've got a wealth of secondary characters you can call on when the time calls for it (as demonstrated in those old rps you posted.)
The Gretchen scene (in the first rp here) with the unborn baby was a nice hook to get us brought up to where Mark's current state of mind is at this moment in time.
The second rp was a more solid rp, overall. Decent promo (if not a little reactionary to what Aries said, and you switched between Mark talking in third and first person, which threw me off a little bit), another character introduced for us (just remember not to over do it and have a different character each week, otherwise they don't develop either and Mark may as well be talking to a wall) the only thing we need more of in the future is story focus.
And now we've got you in a storyline you can start to involve that (how Mark reacts to the accusation he stole Molly's clothes, does he have any memory of it, is it enough to force him to start taking meds again if he can't remember periods of time? etc) in your rps to help boost your score.
Intangibles and continuity you score well on, so keep those up.
TL;DR good work, more story focus needed in the future and try not to overdo the number of secondary characters.
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STORM
Making Waves
Your Hero, And Mine.
Posts: 94
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Post by STORM on Mar 21, 2016 18:29:32 GMT -5
I haven't forgotten, I swear! OK, lets start with a positive note: you've been scoring well so far on the character development part. We've all seen schizophrenic characters before and you're doing better than some I've seen, plus you've got a wealth of secondary characters you can call on when the time calls for it (as demonstrated in those old rps you posted.) The Gretchen scene (in the first rp here) with the unborn baby was a nice hook to get us brought up to where Mark's current state of mind is at this moment in time. The second rp was a more solid rp, overall. Decent promo (if not a little reactionary to what Aries said, and you switched between Mark talking in third and first person, which threw me off a little bit), another character introduced for us (just remember not to over do it and have a different character each week, otherwise they don't develop either and Mark may as well be talking to a wall) the only thing we need more of in the future is story focus. And now we've got you in a storyline you can start to involve that (how Mark reacts to the accusation he stole Molly's clothes, does he have any memory of it, is it enough to force him to start taking meds again if he can't remember periods of time? etc) in your rps to help boost your score. Intangibles and continuity you score well on, so keep those up. TL;DR good work, more story focus needed in the future and try not to overdo the number of secondary characters. Hey, I really appreciate this feedback! Thank you!  |
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