❣
Jun 22, 2015 10:12:22 GMT -5
Post by Perello on Jun 22, 2015 10:12:22 GMT -5
Prince MacRear had been on the phone for twenty minutes now with a custom championship belt design business.
“I DON’T CARE HOW BUSY YOU ARE YOU NASTY! I AM THE CHAMPION AND I’M SICK OF NOT HAVING MY CHAMPIONSHIP! I WANT MY BELT TODAY AND I WANT IT SOON!!!!!!!”
You couldn’t hear what the person on the other end of the phone was saying, but whatever it was, it brought a smile to the Sultan of Selfies face.
“OH MY GOD OH MY GOD! YOU GUYS ARE THE GREATEST! ACTUALLY, NO. I’M THE GREATEST, BUT YOU’RE RIGHT BELOW ME! NOT IN LOOKS OF COURSE...BUT IN SPIRIT!”
The self proclaimed leader of the LDFC locker room listened to whatever the person on the other end of the line was saying, the smile on his face growing wider and wider.
“OKAY, TOOTS! I JUST WANT THE PRETTIEST BELT IN THE WORLD. WITH DIAMONDS ON IT, AND A PURPLE STRAP, AND…”
He paused for a moment.
“You know, it won’t be the prettiest belt ever unless MY face is on it! Can we make that happen? I’ll text you a selfie right now!!”
He stopped his speech, listening to the guy on the other end of the line.
“HOW DO YOU PEOPLE HAVE ALL THESE PICTURES OF ME?! DID YOU HACK INTO MY iCLOUD OR SOMETHING?! YOU DON’T HAVE THOSE… THOOOOOOOOOSE SELFIES DO YOU?!”
His life flashed before his eyes, terrified over the idea of his nude selfies getting leaked out to the media - but, luckily, that wasn’t the case.
“PHEEEEW. OKAY! YOU ALMOST GAVE ME A HEART ATTACK! HOW LONG CAN I PICK MY BELT UP IN!?”
Another pause.
“THREE HOURS!? I’LL BE THERE!”
He pulled his phone away from his ear, set it on his computer desk, and leaned back on his chair.
“I…… AM THE CHAMPION…”
He crossed his fingers behind his head and shut his eyes.
“MY FRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEND!”
After weeks of being the uncrowned champion, Prince finally had it. He FINALLY had HIS championship belt coming to him.
THREE HOURS LATER
[ON CAMERA]
MacRear was walking along Hollywood Boulevard with a big smile plastered on his face. He was dressed in a teal tanktop that read “I’M PRETTY, YOU’RE NOT,” along with a pair of checkered cargo shorts. But, the most important item with him?
His new championship belt that he had buckled around his waist. The strap was purple, and the center piece was none other than the face of Prince MacRear.
“I AM HAPPY! HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY HAPPY HAPPY JOY!”
MacRear shined off his pearly white teeth, ecstatic over the fact that he finally had a championship. His OWN championship.
“I FINALLY, FIIIIIIIIIIIINALLY HAVE MY CHAMPIONSHIP BELT, AND WHO’S TO THANK FOR IT?! SURE AS HECK ISN’T LDFC SINCE THEY’RE LETTING NEST PARADE AROUND WITH THE TITLE THAT I WON! SURE AS HECK ISN’T ANY OF THE TRAINERS IN LDFC SINCE THEY DIDN’T GET ME MY BELT BACK!!!! AND THEY DON’T EVEN TRAIN ME SO SCREW THEM!”
He reached behind his back and unbuckled his belt. He held it up with his right hand and draped it around his shoulder.
“THE ONLY PERSON I CAN THANK FOR IT IS ME! I PAID FOR THIS WITH MY HARD EARNED MONEY, AND NOW… NOW I AM THE CHAMPION! I AM THE APEX MACREAR IS SO PRETTY CHAMPIONSHIP BELT HOLDER! I AM THE TOP BEAUTY OF LDFC! HEHE! And some floozy named BUTCHER isn’t going to take this away from me!!!!! CIAO, BITCHES!"
